Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi,
My young children have ASD and and attend a special school. My children are healthy and happy and have always had the support they need. I'm so thankful for this. It didn't exist when I went to school. This has prompted me to get a diagnosis for myself to see if I could get some support for the lifelong issues I've had i.e. social isolation, anxiety, often feeling overwhelmed . At 43 I was recently diagnosed with Aspergers, although I pretty much self diagnosed myself a long time ago. I did well academically and have always had a job, even though I've always struggled at work. I'm currently an office manager in a very busy environment. Luckily, I'm part time now, which has made things much easier i.e. I have days off to come down from the stress of it but still have high levels of anxiety from this. I read a policy at work about disclosing your disability to your employer as it stated they had a legal right to support you e.g. tailored adjustments etc. I sent my boss an email from home disclosing my diagnosis and didn't get the response I was expecting. He basically just asked why I was telling him about it?! I replied stating somewhere along the lines of support and understanding and that was the end of it. No further discussion. I've been in my current role a long time and I'm good at my job but I'm getting sick of the stress from it. I feel like just quitting and being a stay at home mum but I've worked hard to get the job I have and the loss of money would mean less holidays and things for the kids too. Other than this I've tried to be proactive in getting some support. I'm booked on a course about dealing with anxiety, which I feel is a good start. Can anyone recommend any other things I could try? Thanks in advance.
first Welcome to this blog/forumn
well the course is a very good start.
You're doing great and I recommend you dont leave your job - unless your husband has a very good job in which case you could think of dropping to part-time or job-share for a while so you can get your mind sorted. Get a bit of space for you, the inner you.
Your boss is not uncommon so no surprise there but that does not prevent the current Laws applying to you\him. But dont throw the law at him for now employers have no idea alot of the time.
i used hypnotherapy for years which did help reduce my anxiety but I have ASD. it has stronger behaviours that are more stubborn as i was looking for something else.
I am now trying meditation which took me ages to get correct but it gives me an inner strength and a space just for me which I look forward to every lunch time.
I can now also mediate with my eyes open at my desk for my coffee breaks if need be.
But back to You
try some of the guided hypnotherapy videos on youtube - make sure you cant be disturbed ( sit in car in garage ).
see if it works
also try ones that guide u through hypno and then let you sleep. So you use these when you go to bed ZZZZzzzzzzz.
search for anxiety and relaxation hypnos. Make sure you like the persons voice. use them on regular basis. It takes time for them to embed into your head so don't give up initially that's why the sleep afterwards ones are really good.
Then if the hypnos work you can try meditation. same thing search for guided meditations. Try them 10 - 20 mins at first. talk to me when u are ready.
Women seem to favour yoga - so meditation practise can help that or u can combine them.
u could turn this all upside down and simply start with the yoga - which may work for u. I have no experience of yoga .
The key to these techniques ( hypno and meditation ) is the regular usage every day over long period ( ideally the rest of your life ).
the really good thing about meditation is that u cant fail even the attempts are progress :)
Thanks for the advice. I've actually already got some some hypnotherapy cd's (Mark Bowden) from Amazon and your post has encouraged me to take some time out to actually listen to them rather than them just sitting in a drawer. Even though I think of quitting work I know I won't. I've worked too hard to get to where I am just to give it up. I'll see how things go. I think because I'm good at my job and am continually "social masking" my boss may not realise I'm actually struggling. However, it would have been nice if he'd asked for a chat about it rather than avoiding the topic altogether. Thanks for the advice again. Hope things go well for you.