Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi,
My young children have ASD and and attend a special school. My children are healthy and happy and have always had the support they need. I'm so thankful for this. It didn't exist when I went to school. This has prompted me to get a diagnosis for myself to see if I could get some support for the lifelong issues I've had i.e. social isolation, anxiety, often feeling overwhelmed . At 43 I was recently diagnosed with Aspergers, although I pretty much self diagnosed myself a long time ago. I did well academically and have always had a job, even though I've always struggled at work. I'm currently an office manager in a very busy environment. Luckily, I'm part time now, which has made things much easier i.e. I have days off to come down from the stress of it but still have high levels of anxiety from this. I read a policy at work about disclosing your disability to your employer as it stated they had a legal right to support you e.g. tailored adjustments etc. I sent my boss an email from home disclosing my diagnosis and didn't get the response I was expecting. He basically just asked why I was telling him about it?! I replied stating somewhere along the lines of support and understanding and that was the end of it. No further discussion. I've been in my current role a long time and I'm good at my job but I'm getting sick of the stress from it. I feel like just quitting and being a stay at home mum but I've worked hard to get the job I have and the loss of money would mean less holidays and things for the kids too. Other than this I've tried to be proactive in getting some support. I'm booked on a course about dealing with anxiety, which I feel is a good start. Can anyone recommend any other things I could try? Thanks in advance.
Your boss sounds incredibly unprofessional and rude. I'd recommend contacting the NAS Helpline for some advice on your employer.
Well done for being brave enough to tell him though - I'm still waiting for diagnosis, but I haven't decided whether I'll tell my employer or not once I have the diagnosis. It's a big decision, but I think it's positive that you're being open with people. It's just a shame your employer hasn't been helpful.
Thanks for the advice. I will contact the NAS helpline. Even though I think of quitting often it I know I won't. I've worked too hard to get to where I am to give it up. I was in limbo too whether to tell my employer and even though I haven't received the response I wished for I'm glad I did. The only thing I asked of him was not to tell my colleagues. As I line manage them I suppose I'm worried about their reaction and whether their behaviour towards me will change. Thanks again and good luck with everything.
There's no rush to tell other people - you can just take things at your pace and do what feels right. Thank you - hope the work situation improves soon.