Published on 12, July, 2020
I haven't been part of this online community for long, and I'm only part-way through the autism diagnosis process at the moment.
What I am finding incredible is how comfortable I feel here, especially as I struggle so much to connect with people in other spheres of life.
As a child I felt like an outsider in my birth family, so much so that I became convinced I was adopted. Eventually I had to acknowledge this was unlikely (my unusual nose is identical to my dad's!).
Being part of this community is like being on one of those TV programmes where people are reunited with long lost siblings. They may have been apart for many years but once they are together they share so much common ground.
My birth family will always be my birth family, but it is wonderful to have found all these new autistic brothers and sisters.
It's quite overwhelming, but in a good way.
Did you feel the same when you joined this online community?
I always felt like I must be a foundling as a kid too, although I look so much like my mum, I am quite sure this is not the case! I agree though, it is so nice to "meet" people whose perspective on life seems less strange ....
One of the great things about diagnosis is that, if you're lucky, your family may want to know more about autism and will finally start to understand why you do some of the things you do, and are the way you are :-)
That was slightly tinged with sadness in my mum's case though, because her father had Asperger's (like me) and many of the things I have explained to her about how I experience the world have made her realise why he did certain things, and why certain things caused him a lot of distress. Sadly, I got my diagnosis after he had passed on, so too late for him to benefit from the understanding she has now. I think she is quite sad about that. Some of the things she judged him for, and maybe complained about, she now realises were probably down to sensory sensitivities causing him a lot of stress for example, she would understand now but at the time thought he was being difficult.
It has been great meeting the folks on here. If you're diagnosed later in life, it's really helpful to be able to ask questions of folks too, and get other people's take on things.
That's so encouranging and helpful, thank you. I was a little concerned about talking to my parents. They are in their 80s and my mum gets quite anxious. My younger sister had a chat with them about providing some information for my assessment and they were fine with it. It is really sad to consider people like your mum's father who may have lived their whole lives without ever knowing why they struggled to cope. I agree about the benefits of being able to ask questions. There's a lot to try and understand.