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Sharing news of diagnosis

Natalia

I was diagnosed with Autism in July, aged 39, and though this diagnosis has been a relief, and has helped me better understand myself and my struggles since childhood, I have shared this news with only a very small number of people. I have not told my parents,  and I have only told one of my friends. Only my husband and my brother knew I was being assessed, and so the news is likely to be a surprise for everyone else.  I would like to share this information more widely, but I am worried about how people will react, and whether or not the information will be helpful or harmful to our relationships/friendships, and how they see me. In some cases such as with my parents, I am worried about them being dismissive of the diagnosis. Sharing news of a diagnosis of something like Autism is also not an easy thing to bring up in every day conversation, and so though I have planed to mention it on a number of occasions, I have just not felt able to.

It would be really helpful to hear any advice or experience of overcome similar worries or mental barriers to sharing the news of an Autism diagnosis.

  • in reply to Retired Teacher (NAS96182)

    Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. It is hard getting a diagnosis as an adult not to feel sad for not having benefited from a diagnosis earlier in life. I am glad to hear though that you were able to get some workplace adjustments, and I hope the diagnosis has helped you better understand yourself. 

  • in reply to Nemo

    Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I'm really sorry your family were so dismissive, and that you are having such a tough time. I hope you are able to get the support you need. 

  • in reply to Mia151515

    Thank you for your kind words.I appreciate it very much.

    I have severe difficulties with all interpersonal communications.

    At this stage in my life, I'm just satisfied I have food and shelter - and the kind people here.

  • in reply to Nemo

    I'm really sorry that they disregarded you this way. Maybe it is worth speaking to them more regarding your autism and express to them that it's wrong they're dismissing you

  • Hi Natalia, Welcome to the community. Here is my experience of sharing a diagnosis. I don't give advice.

    I was diagnosed in March this year and am 66 years old. I have told only four people: my wife and our two adult children and my GP. I had to circumvent my GP to get a diagnosis. Here are the verbatim responses of my family:

    Wife. "Everybody is autistic these days", followed a few hours later with "I suppose that makes me a saint". Since then, there has been no mention of the A word.

    Son. "It's just your personality". Nothing since.

    Daughter. "             ". Nothing then and nothing since, not a single word about autism or anything else.

    My GP refuses to acknowledge my diagnosis. I have seen here each week since the diagnosis about my co-morbid difficulties, of which there are many. She has been pushing me to see a psychiatrist. Last week she advised me she wants me to see a particular psychiatrist to be reassessed and to receive ECT. I am supposed to see her later today but I don't feel well enough to attend. My anxiety has reached new levels I did not know existed. Since last week I have not been able to sleep. She is the only support I have.

    Please do not be put off by my experiences. I wish you well on your journey.

  • Congratulations regarding the diagnosis. I was clinically diagnosed when I was 60 and was greatly relieved as well to finally know why I was the way I was.

    When I mentioned my diagnosis to one of my cousins, he grunted and said, "I've known this for years." I wish he had said something much earlier in my life because I would have sought a diagnosis and I might have made some different career decisions.

    Since I was still on speaking terms with my father, I told him via email. My father's only reply was to say that he had always known that I was different but hadn't known why.

    I also told my employer. I was teaching at the time. I used my disability to leverage workplace related accommodations. I'm American and autism has legal protections under the ADA, the Americans with Disabilities Act. 

  • Thank you for sharing the NAS advice link with me.