Worried about autistic brother's meltdowns

Hi Jessica,

This might seem like a strange question but have you read the Curious Incident of the dog in the night time? 

JustJessica said:

I think he might have aspergers syndrome too since he's very bright but also very literal and introverted.

Asperger's is a form of autism. It isn't a separate syndrome. Autism covers a massive spectrum of people of different ability and different degrees of difficulty. They used to distinguish between Aspergers and autism but they were mainly distinguishing between low functioning autism and high functioning autism. There is an issue that the problems of autism can make someone appear to be not very bright when actually their intelligence was hidden by their behaviour.

I talked to my Dad a couple times about it, he says I should either let it go or do something about it. I'll book an appointment with his GP next week to get him refered to a child psychologist/psychiatrist about his anger...Idk how much Dad knows about autism, just that he's not supposed to lose his temper when my brother gets mad, and look out for things that might trigger him.

My brother gets help from a TA and he has counselling every month but clearly that's not working with whatever's upsetting him. He's managing alright from what I've heard but he's about to enter secondary school. That's the big worry, year 7 was hell. I think he might have aspergers syndrome too since he's very bright but also very literal and introverted.

I don't know, it felt good to talk about it at least. Everything's calmed down now but there's still some tension. For now I think I'll put the knives away, call the GP on Monday.

The police can be a last resort please but don't be afraid to call them, your brother shouldn't get into trouble with them - they are more likely to get him some help to deal with his behaviour.

I think you would do well to learn something more about autism, your brother needs more help and you are in a good place to help him and help to find people who can help him.

Have you talked to your father about your brother's autism?  What does he know about autism?

Has you brother received any help from anybody to deal with his behaviour? How does he manage with school?

Hi! Thanks for replying, don't know loads I'll be honest. My parents used to have counselling meetings to talk about his issues/how to deal with them but they haven't really been going much anymore. 

Here's what I know:

• He has problems socialising and expressing his emotions, this gets him frustrated when other people don't understand what he wants/needs.
• He hates to feel ignored or belittled, and does NOT forgive and forget. Ever. Really, he holds some serious grudges.
• He has a bit of a history of turning aggressive when he's upset but it hasn't been this bad in years since he's been seeing a counsellor and during school has his own TA and 'cool down' room. I don't know if I could call the cops on my own brother though...it's tricky, but you're right this isn't normal. After today's brawl in the kitchen I contacted one of his counsellors about getting him more treatment, hopefully she'll get back soon.

You wouldn't happen to have any other ideas about what I could do for now, beside police? If he does it again I'll do it, but really I'd like to think of that as a last resort. I know for a fact my Dad would never support that, Mum probably wouldn't either.

No-one really talked to me about his condition, I guess cause I was still just a little kid when he was diagnosed, so I've got no clue how to get him to calm down when he gets like that. Like I said, we're practically the same height and I'm an utter wimp so-erm-physical altercations don't tend to go well.

Any advise/input much appreciated

Hi Jessica, welcome to the forum, sorry to hear that you are having a big problem.

If anybody, even your own 11 year old brother, pulls a knife on you then you really should call the police. I have autism but fully understand that you just can't do that, it does not excuse that. The police are very used to problems like this and if you explained that he has autism then he would be properly handled. Someone actually said on the forum recently that they are so used to this sort of thing that they can be better than calling the mental health professionals.

How much do you know about autism?