My 1st post

Hi GlamMam,

Your story sounds a lot like my own. My son (17 next month) got good marks at school too, but cant cope with the world at large and gets very confused at college.  I think people in general have difficulty separating educational ability with the ability to cope in the world. They think because he got good marks he is clever and should be able to manage everything. Its very frustrating. Does the person that contacted you with concerns over your son not have a 'duty of care' to help him or does 'duty of care' stop when they are no longer children?

Hope everything is a bit better by now

Take care

Hi longman,

I think its just gone quiet as there is a lot of information to go through and check out with the uni. I always read your posts as they are a big help to me. I will be using the info myself when im looking at my son getting to uni. He has applied for his HNC course next year so starting the whole SAAS disability student funding soon myself. Thanks loads.

Sam

x

Just hoping this was helpful as the thread seems to have gone quiet....me sounding off too much maybe.

One or two further points. I note re-reading that he is doing Biology so that cancels out some of my comments on subject.

Is it just living independently that is the problem, or is it fitting in socially, or coursework? Or several or all of these?

Although support may cover lectures and assessment there may be much less done re independent living and socialising.

It is often the case that lecturers and academic tutors can only discuss things directly with the student. University is a contract with the student, so teaching staff usually cannot talk to parents. The options for disability support staff vary widely, and they may have restrictions on what they can tell you. If there are such barriers your son would have to give written consent for you to be involved.

Academic staff may be limited in what they can do about social integration and lifestyle. They probably have to talk to the disability support team. They are not there  "in loco parentis" as applies to school-teachers. They often aren't trained in providing non-academic support.

This is a current system weakness because the people your son will have most involvement with, after fellow students, are the academic tutors. Disability support staff may not be in the direct support loop, other than ensuring provisions are met and sending out basic guidelines to tutors. Disability support teams are often understaffed and overstretched.

It would be useful to find out what training halls staff get - wardens and sub-wardens, non academic hall tutors (if any these days), bursars, hall managers, cleaning staff.

Bizarrely, for someone having fitting in at work problems and so on, I was a hall of residence tutor for three years while doing my PhD. Halls often run largely through conduct contracts with the individual students. The "staff" may have a role limited to intervention only when property is being damaged, or mayhem let loose (drunkenness, rowdiness, late night parties). So your son may be having to fit in with a peer group that might not be suitable.

You need to get a clearer puictutre of just what living conditions he is trying to contend with.

I have several perspectives on this, as a recently retired university lecturer who was also a disability coordinator, in some cases working closely with students on the spectrum,and being diagnosed with aspergers myself.

Several questions I should ask first:

Did they give you a meeting before enrolment so you could discuss with support staff and course tutors what help was available? They should do this if you ask, but not all universities are pro-active in setting up these meetings. They can help you understand the issues he is dealing with, and it might be worth asking for one now.

What type of student accommodation is he in? Most universities now provide shared flats, self-catering. Some traditional universities have individual study bedrooms with central catering, but these are gradually being superceded. In shared flats it is important he is in with a suitable group - they might be too noisy and partying all the time. On the other hand the traditional room can be very anonymous and isolating for someone who doesn't mix.

Has he got a full DSA, and are you paying additional support? DSA should be adequate for support, but you really need to find out what is being provided. Some universities provide a note-taker, who's primary role is to accompany him to lectures and take lecture notes. Some universities automatically provide counselling tutorials which may not necessarily be appropriate - understanding of ASDs varies.

Is he able to sit in a lecture room and listen to a lecture? Does he have to ask questions or ask for individual tuition? Does he have to sit anywhere special? Are there proximity issues with other students? Does he have any problems with strip lights or humming equipment? Students are expected to sit together in lecture theatres or class-rooms depending on class size, and in first year mostly listen to a lecturer presenting ideas to the whole room. But there may be practical classes or seminars involving two-way exchanges in front of others, including giving presentations in front of others.

Is he doing any laboratory work handling chemicals or equipment which he might be anxious about?  Consider smells, noises, soiling of hands, minor personal risks.

Is his choice of subject matched by the content of the course?  If he is inclined to do only what interests him and disregard anything which bores him he could get into difficulties. Degree courses ask all students to complete certain objectives. Beware of things like pure mathematics (highly theoretical and not necessarily appropriate to having an aptitude for numbers) or computing (which may ask for things he doesn't like doing as much as things he does).

Can he complete an assignment (essay, report, series of calculations, drawing maps or diagrams) or are there things he wont do?

These are the things that need to be sorted before starting a degree course. If you are able to feed me back a few insights I might be able to offer some further pointers.