I don't know where to go from here

My 9 year old DS has ASD and has sensory processing disorder. He attends mainstream school but has always struggled. This term he is really struggling for example last week he got upset because his usual seat was not available at lunch time and he had to move desks in his classroom so he cut up his polo shirt with a pair of scissors. Every morning he asks us not to send him to school. I have had a long chat with him and he says that the crowds of children and the constant noise are too much for him. Over the past 2/3 years we have had various meetings with the school about this but as much as they say they are dealing with things they still do things like take his figet toy off him because he is fidgetting. We have tried twice to get him a statement but each time the school have said he is ok and we have been refused an assessment for a statement. We are at the point now where we feel bad sending him to school but just do not know where to go from here or what to do. Does anyone have any suggestions? Thanks in advance.