Feeling so stressed, how do you help yourself?

There is so much advice online for dealing with anxiety and panic - it’s just a matter of trying various strategies and seeing what works for you. Using breathing techniques might be a cliche but they really can help. Exercise can help, getting outside is good. Meditation is definitely useful if you can find a method that suits you. Buddhist teachings have helped me a lot, as has Qigong exercises.

Also - your situation is stressful from what you’ve said here - and nothing is going to make it not stressful. Sometimes being able to find acceptance within yourself that this situation is inherently stressful and not fighting the fact of that - can help. Surrender to it - I’m going to find aspects of my situation stressful and I need to find deep acceptance of that rather than resisting what is just a fact that I can’t completely control. 
You’re 100% trying to help your son not to have a meltdown - but maybe you need to find a measure of acceptance that it’s going to happen sometimes - no matter what you do. 

And also - can you have someone else take care of your son for short periods so you can have a proper rest?

I literally run 10k every morning to ensure I get out. I haven't seen a Dr at all as I worry about judgement, it's hard to explain all the time. 

I definitely will look at breathing and maybe acceptance. 

I think you hit a nerve here, I can't accept there's not more I can do to help. 

I feel as him mum. It's my job. And I'm not doing good enough no matter what I do. 

My mum helps but it's quite tiring and I don't want to put pressure on. But even then. I struggle to rest, of that makes sense. 

Thank you for replying.  

I'm so desperate now x

I literally run 10k every morning to ensure I get out. I haven't seen a Dr at all as I worry about judgement, it's hard to explain all the time. 

I definitely will look at breathing and maybe acceptance. 

I think you hit a nerve here, I can't accept there's not more I can do to help. 

I feel as him mum. It's my job. And I'm not doing good enough no matter what I do. 

My mum helps but it's quite tiring and I don't want to put pressure on. But even then. I struggle to rest, of that makes sense. 

Thank you for replying.  

I'm so desperate now x

AbC123 said:

I haven't seen a Dr at all as I worry about judgement, it's hard to explain all the time. 

I would recommend seeing a therapist rather than the doc - they are trained to not be judgemental and should have plenty of practice in training you in various techniques to get your anxiety under control.

You can do the calls via Zoom so no need to physically be there if your schedule it tight or you cannot find one locally.

Just make sure they are well versed in working with autists and people with anxiety - this should give a combo you can use.

A good place to start the search is: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists?search=

Click on filters, add Autism and anxiety and search in the area you are in to find those nearest you.

Good luck