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siblings

Randomgrl
over 13 years ago

I am very to close and have always being very involved in the care of my brother with autism and I just wanted to ask if there are any other siblings on here who have similiar experiences or to ask parents how involved are your children who are not on the spectrum with their sibling(s) who are?

I have found that there seems to be more awareness of autism now than when I was growing up so I also wanted to ask how do you explain what autism is? This was something I found difficult to explain as a child to other children so just out of interest I would like to know what your experiences with dealing with this are.

Parents
  • over 12 years ago

    Hey Sarah, 

    I have continued to build a life outside of my sister and her condition, and I am now in a position where I feel I can help her without it negatively impacting my life. As my other siblings have left home and my parents are too busy, I have taken the responsibility of guiding her. I want her to have a good, fulfilling life but I still face resistance from her. She does co operate sometimes but you have to be assertive to really get your own way. It is hard work but to live happily I have to know she is doing ok. I am doing this by getting her work experience with the hope she get a job at some point, and getting her to join clubs so she has an external support network. I am also contacting support groups who can help her more than her family can. Personally I am doing much better now, it is hard work but I have more independence so can escape it more often. It is important for me to have a life that she isn't involved in or I'd go crazy!

    I think the most important thing for your daughter in this situation is for her to feel like you give her just as much attention as your other daughter (my parents still don't manage this, I wish they would) and for your daughter to have a fulfilling life outside of it all. Spend time with her, make her the priority because it is so easy to unconsciously concentrate on the vulnerable or struggling child. I'm not sure if you can privately message on this site, but if you need any more advice or anything feel free to ask. 

    Amy

Reply
  • over 12 years ago

    Hey Sarah, 

    I have continued to build a life outside of my sister and her condition, and I am now in a position where I feel I can help her without it negatively impacting my life. As my other siblings have left home and my parents are too busy, I have taken the responsibility of guiding her. I want her to have a good, fulfilling life but I still face resistance from her. She does co operate sometimes but you have to be assertive to really get your own way. It is hard work but to live happily I have to know she is doing ok. I am doing this by getting her work experience with the hope she get a job at some point, and getting her to join clubs so she has an external support network. I am also contacting support groups who can help her more than her family can. Personally I am doing much better now, it is hard work but I have more independence so can escape it more often. It is important for me to have a life that she isn't involved in or I'd go crazy!

    I think the most important thing for your daughter in this situation is for her to feel like you give her just as much attention as your other daughter (my parents still don't manage this, I wish they would) and for your daughter to have a fulfilling life outside of it all. Spend time with her, make her the priority because it is so easy to unconsciously concentrate on the vulnerable or struggling child. I'm not sure if you can privately message on this site, but if you need any more advice or anything feel free to ask. 

    Amy

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