Published on 12, July, 2020
My daughter has recently started biting her arms over the past few weeks. She has many bruises on her arms which some are swollen. They range from big to small little ones and look very painful. She had to be held because of this yesterday in school. They explained that she was biting with extreme force so they held her to stop her. She's never done this before and I'm lost on what to do. Like, how do I prevent the worst injuries as much as I can without touching her because that makes it worse?
We know what causes the biting and have tried distraction and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. She usually bites in a meltdown which can be really bad, especially in school, so usually they hold her while it happens. We use other techniques because it's not so bad.
I'm sorry to hear about your son. It is hard. We just scrapped homework altogether at the end but sometimes she would do it willingly or in school.
Hi, It’s must be hard seeing your child bite themselves over the worry of home work. I have been there with my son.
My son who’s 11 does no homework at home at all. Homework causes my Child so much anxiety and stress which then makes me stressed. Just after my son was diagnosed nearly 5 years ago myself and the school made a joint decision that my child no longer was required to do any school work or school projects at home. School work ends when the school day finishes.
Hi there, I’m quite new to all of this. My son (10) has recently been diagnosed with autism and ADHD and I am doing an online course to try and understand the condition better.
My son also bites himself, and others, and it can be very distressing for a parent to witness. I find that if I can start to talk to him about his favourite subject (gaming) then it can be enough to distract him. I suppose the trick is, as others have mentioned, to try and find out what is causing the behaviour in the first place - my son often does it when we try to do homework, which he obviously finds stressful and frustrating. Unfortunately doing school work and homework are part of life, it would be interesting to hear if anyone who has autism can provide some advice on how to make this easier.
Another final thing, which you have probably already done, try and speak to your daughter to find out what is bothering her when she does it.
I hope you manage to get the issues resolved.
Hello,
My son (now 20 and 'high functioning') started biting his arms as a teen. He was unhappy in school, very frustrated and it was almost like a form of self harm. He needed a release from what was going on in his body. He quickly moved setting and the biting stopped straight away.
Hope you manage to find the root of the problem x
We haven't seen the doctor because we aren't a big fan of them with her. She does have anxiety but we know when she's anxious because she will go quiet, look paler and with play with her fingers.
She will bite her arms and hurt herself during a meltdown or when she is overloaded by something. She uses stress toys when she's anxious if she has them otherwise if she's trying to bite herself she's not in the frame of mind to even think about anything.
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Yeah I've found music the best remedy so far exercise helps district me from my anxiety too as in work out to the point where I feel physical pain from that as it's healthier alternative to the self harming but understand why some of us on spectrum probably get more anxity due to going to a gym as again it's public spaces and stuff so you kind of feel like your being judged there I guess to but again partly why I bring my headphones to help drown out the conversations around me so my anxiety doesn't kick in as much once I'm focused on music. For me it's metal and punk as I like to focus on the complexity of the rifts and helps me exspress my emotions when I strugel to do so otherwise.
She takes her ear defenders to school and listens to music at home all the time and school ask her if she wants music every now and again
Music also helped me with my anxiety never leave home without my noise canceling headphones now
Yeah I'm always very anxious in public when I'm sober don't like being in big crowds or public transport when I'm sober especially if I don't have my headphones as you kind of feel like people are judging you or talking about you when you know there not and it's all in your head but it will definitely be anxity that triggers it. But the only downside is finding ways of countering anxiety as meds don't work for autism. If anything they numb our senses and make it worse. I've been on numours anti anxiety meds and anti dipressnts none have worked so I avoid them. But my tattoos have helped massively with confidence but I still suffer quite badly from tremmers in my hands due to my anxiety.
Her meltdowns are triggered by a number of things, mainly due to anxiety when she's in public places, but then there's there's sensory side which causes them sometimes boredom, hunger and tiredness will cause one. Just got to figure out which one it is and find the best way to help.
Thank you. She will play with her sensory toys whenever she feels like it. I know one time she distracted herself in a meltdown when I wasn't home. It was amazing. We've come so far. She was hurting herself, screaming, crying and she managed to take control and put her favorite Netflix Movie on in the middle of it all and used her chew toys aswell. It was great but I still don't know why it happened but its fine.
Guessing it's s sort of self halm thing maybe due to stress and anxiety. I use to self halm myself when I was anxious or overwlemed with stress basically my equivalent handling burnout or melt downs. Ive now managed to find coping methods for it. As my alternative therapy is getting tattoos done as the pain helps ease my anxiety as I'm focused on something ellse rather than my anxiety. Obviously that method doesn't work for everyone. But yeah it's probably caused by meltdowns due to intence anxiety. It's like getting angry basically but cause you don't want to take your anger out people you take it out on yourself.
I know not much will get through in a meltdown, so you're doing your best by keeping her safe instead of making the situation more overwhelming for her. Enough redirection to other things when she's calm will likely make her do it less during meltdowns too, so don't ignore it in those calm moments. I hope you can find something that works for the two of you and she doesn't continue biting herself for too long.
She does have a chewy necklace. She's gone through many and this one is starting to break but we can't find any that are better suited for her. She also has a chewy which is on her wrist which we thought was indestructible but she's chewing through that at the moment. We have tried redirecting her and school have tried but they have found out that when she's in the middle of a meltdown or kicking off, she can't hear us and has no clue what is happening around her so it's hard to redirect her. Just have to keep her safe until she calms down.
We have put her sensory toys next to her bed so they are reachable and I've tried giving them to her but she just either hits them on her head, hurts herself with them or chucks them about so I'm not sure what to do
Sounds to me like it's a stim for her, and they can be hard to get out of. All I can think that might help is that when you catch her doing it you try to distract her with a healthier method of stimming, like a fidget toy. You could also always try and see if a chewable necklace will do the trick, and you can calmly redirect her to that to bite instead if you catch her biting her arms.
She also has a bruise on her legs and upper arm, not from biting but from yesterday's incident at school. Probably from having to be held and because she puts up a fight injuring herself trying to get away or whatever she does.
She mainly does it in school during a meltdown or when she's struggling and loses control but I have caught her a few times biting herself in her bedroom when she's calm. She does it when she's alone but also when there is someone around but that's because she's in school
Yes, like that. Seems it is a usual thing for kids to experiment with then, but not at a self destructive level.
Is the biting giving her a desired attention? Is she doing it to drive people away?