My 7 year old was diagnosed asd last week, any advice appreciated

Hi! My 2 nearly 3 year old daughter was diagnosed autistic in August, I’m also autistic myself. 
I imagine that after all the effort to get a diagnosis, it now feels a little like you have no clear directions as to where to go from here?

I did attend a course for parents of autistic children, run by the local specialist pre-school teachers. It was useful in terms of explaining various strategies to use etc. If I’m honest though, the vast majority of the support that I’ve had with coming to terms with my daughters diagnosis has been from my autistic friends who both accept and ‘get’ it. 
Keep using the forum, hopefully you can find some helpful understanding here

Thank you so much!!! I knew it was coming, he had all the signs etc the fight for help and answers is so long I thought I was never going to get to the end. I've put myself forward for a course to help parents with asd children so hopefully that will help. Ultimately nothing has changed because he's been this way from a young age but he's getting worse and I'm never quite sure I'm doing the right thing. Sometimes I tell him off then feel terrible because he hasn't understood something. It's a whirlwind and I find it hard to admit that I don't understand my own child  

I have heard that it can be difficult to get a diagnosis. My youngest was put through for ASD assessment quite quickly as she is ‘high needs’, she has been under a paediatrician and various other professionals since she was less than one year old due to also having global developmental delay. As soon as her paediatrician learned of my autism diagnosis at the end of last year and I requested that she be assessed too, he immediately referred her.

Regarding DLA I also claim this for my youngest. I believe that Magnolia1 has already provided the link to the form. 
In what way us your son ‘getting worse’? It might be difficult to separate what behaviour is normal childhood testing of boundaries and what is due to autism? It’s difficult to not understand your own child, I have this with my middle daughter who is the one of my 3 who is definitely not autistic, I tend to let my husband deal with her more. 

He's already on an IEP plan and when the educational psychologist visits him again in May, depending on progress they will decide whether an EHC is needed or not. I've had so many doors slammed in my face along this journey I don't hold alot of hope. I'm going to speak to the gp next week and see if there is anything he suggests for his sleep because I'm dead most days. It's not good for him either because it has started affecting his school work. He doesn't have good focus anyway but with sleep deprivation it is undoubtedly worse! 

It must all seem rather bewildering at the moment. I ‘hope’ that once the school has a copy of the diagnostic report the school SENCO will go through the appropriate procedures to get support in place for your son. ONE plans and an EHCP are things that would ‘ideally’ be put in place:

http://www.essexlocaloffer.org.uk/category/one-planning-and-education-health-and-care-plan/

http://www.essexlocaloffer.org.uk/one-plan-templates/

I also found the link for Hampshire Country Council Autism Hun which contains some information about websites and resources

https://fish.hants.gov.uk/kb5/hampshire/directory/advice.page?id=GPiU4slBXJE

I found DLA quite easy to get. I’d say it’s worth applying, best to take all the help you can get. 
I know the lack of sleep isn’t his fault and obviously as his parent you want to care for and nurture him. You need to look after yourself too though and lack of sleep never helps anyone! That’s why it’s important to try to get as much help as you can as early as you can. You may hit a few metaphorical brick walls in the short term, but keep on pushing for the support that you and your family need, in the long term as well as the short term. 
Good luck!

I find DLA really easy. I was v surprised when we got it and it is really helpful as it pays firxa specialist piano teacher and 1 to 1 art lessons 

Thank you so much. Your help is really appreciated!! No they gave me Nothing. The psychologist literally closed his laptop, pulled his glasses down to his nose and said your son is definitely on the asd spectrum he's a prime case of autism with aspergers traits. It's important that you know that this is for life and won't go away. I asked what happens next and he said nothing, we have disgnsoed you'll get the report in the post on a few weeks time and it's important u take it to the school. That was it. I think that's why I'm Feeling a bit lost because he told me the diagnosis then basically left me to it. Everywhere is closed over Christmas aswell so im having to wait to speak to the people that run the courses to try and attend one to help us out.

The DLA thing I'm not too worried about, I doubt he would be eligible anyway it sounds like it's really hard to get. 

As for the sleep.... I'm a zombie most days! It's not his fault though so I've just learnt to be patient with him and deal with less sleep.

I know in time everything will be fine, I just feel a bit out of sorts with the whole situation at the moment. Thank you so much for replying. It really means alot xx

The lack of sleep must be exhausting for you! It’s scary too when they lack awareness of danger and their surroundings. It feels a bit wrong that they’ve just left you with no help or support! Did they give you any leaflets with useful numbers on when he was diagnosed? Most County Councils have an Autism section in their disability services part of their website which should contain helpful numbers and resources. Also there is a helpline on this very website which may be able to offer advice about how to manage worrying behaviour and also what services you might be able to access.

https://www.autism.org.uk/get-involved/about-us/contact-us.aspx

If you apply for DLA then you also have a limited time after it is awarded to apply for carers allowance. Unfortunately this is means tested but, if you have to take a term time only job (which would be a huge shame) then maybe you would be entitled for some of the year. Might be worth applying just in case. 
As I said before, it would be a shame if you have to fold your cleaning business. Perhaps your local autism services might have details about holiday clubs for children with additional needs, because these do exist, and how to access them. 
I’ll post more potential resources if I think of any but I hope this helps.

The lack of sleep must be exhausting for you! It’s scary too when they lack awareness of danger and their surroundings. It feels a bit wrong that they’ve just left you with no help or support! Did they give you any leaflets with useful numbers on when he was diagnosed? Most County Councils have an Autism section in their disability services part of their website which should contain helpful numbers and resources. Also there is a helpline on this very website which may be able to offer advice about how to manage worrying behaviour and also what services you might be able to access.

https://www.autism.org.uk/get-involved/about-us/contact-us.aspx

If you apply for DLA then you also have a limited time after it is awarded to apply for carers allowance. Unfortunately this is means tested but, if you have to take a term time only job (which would be a huge shame) then maybe you would be entitled for some of the year. Might be worth applying just in case. 
As I said before, it would be a shame if you have to fold your cleaning business. Perhaps your local autism services might have details about holiday clubs for children with additional needs, because these do exist, and how to access them. 
I’ll post more potential resources if I think of any but I hope this helps.

He's already on an IEP plan and when the educational psychologist visits him again in May, depending on progress they will decide whether an EHC is needed or not. I've had so many doors slammed in my face along this journey I don't hold alot of hope. I'm going to speak to the gp next week and see if there is anything he suggests for his sleep because I'm dead most days. It's not good for him either because it has started affecting his school work. He doesn't have good focus anyway but with sleep deprivation it is undoubtedly worse! 

It must all seem rather bewildering at the moment. I ‘hope’ that once the school has a copy of the diagnostic report the school SENCO will go through the appropriate procedures to get support in place for your son. ONE plans and an EHCP are things that would ‘ideally’ be put in place:

http://www.essexlocaloffer.org.uk/category/one-planning-and-education-health-and-care-plan/

http://www.essexlocaloffer.org.uk/one-plan-templates/

I also found the link for Hampshire Country Council Autism Hun which contains some information about websites and resources

https://fish.hants.gov.uk/kb5/hampshire/directory/advice.page?id=GPiU4slBXJE

I found DLA quite easy to get. I’d say it’s worth applying, best to take all the help you can get. 
I know the lack of sleep isn’t his fault and obviously as his parent you want to care for and nurture him. You need to look after yourself too though and lack of sleep never helps anyone! That’s why it’s important to try to get as much help as you can as early as you can. You may hit a few metaphorical brick walls in the short term, but keep on pushing for the support that you and your family need, in the long term as well as the short term. 
Good luck!

I find DLA really easy. I was v surprised when we got it and it is really helpful as it pays firxa specialist piano teacher and 1 to 1 art lessons 

Thank you so much. Your help is really appreciated!! No they gave me Nothing. The psychologist literally closed his laptop, pulled his glasses down to his nose and said your son is definitely on the asd spectrum he's a prime case of autism with aspergers traits. It's important that you know that this is for life and won't go away. I asked what happens next and he said nothing, we have disgnsoed you'll get the report in the post on a few weeks time and it's important u take it to the school. That was it. I think that's why I'm Feeling a bit lost because he told me the diagnosis then basically left me to it. Everywhere is closed over Christmas aswell so im having to wait to speak to the people that run the courses to try and attend one to help us out.

The DLA thing I'm not too worried about, I doubt he would be eligible anyway it sounds like it's really hard to get. 

As for the sleep.... I'm a zombie most days! It's not his fault though so I've just learnt to be patient with him and deal with less sleep.

I know in time everything will be fine, I just feel a bit out of sorts with the whole situation at the moment. Thank you so much for replying. It really means alot xx