Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, my Autistic 10yo son struggles to identify his emotions, and as a result can end up in quite a state when he's stressed/worried. He usually ends up feeling overwhelmed once he goes to bed, and I'll find him at the top of the stairs a couple of hours after putting him to bed saying he can't sleep, he feels sick, and covered in blood from where he's either picked at his skin, or bitten his lower lip! When I've talked to him about it he says it's not done on purpose (so not self-harming as such), he doesn't realise he's done it until he sees the blood. It seems to be what he does as he's lying there worrying. How can I help him find a safer/healthier way to deal with his stresses (& help him to recognise it better so he can talk to us about it!)?
The counsellors and psychologist I go see advised me to replace the scratching and biting and self-harm with something else like an elastic band or bracelet. Also you'd need to identify if it is pain-related because then it needs to be replaced by something that causes a little pain but no harm.
I suppose your son is following some sort of counselling? They told me to figure out why I do it, in order to avoid it (if it stems from overload).
In the past I've tried a bracelet but it didn't do the trick for me. As of present still on the lookout for something that helps.
Thanks for your reply. Funnily enough I've just been Googling sensory chewing bracelets with the thought that might help! Unfortunately we've not been offered any counselling, so I'm on my own trying to figure this one out (thank goodness for this forum!). The stimming usually happens when he's stressing about something school related. He won't talk about it, so often we're unaware there's a problem until he's up in the night saying he can't sleep & feels sick & is bleeding from whatever he's done to himself!
Found it back for you although it might not be exactly what you are looking for:
Thank you. I hadn't thought of that. I will give it a try.
Pendant wouldn't be a good idea, I agree.
I was thinking: have you contacted the NAS about getting advice and/or help with your son?
I'm sure they'd know where to direct you.
Thanks. I am thinking a chewable sensory toy may be the way to go to start with. I've found these chewy-circle-clip-on-black, chew-noodle, tread chew bracelet which might be good. Don't want a pendant type as wouldn't want him wearing something around his neck at night. I'll research more tomorrow. Thanks for your replies. Much appreciated.