ever feel like just running away..

Sorry to hear you're having a difficult time. I have an autistic son, who is now 14, and was diagnosed at 5 years old. Back then my husband, in fact my whole family, were in denial and I felt very alone. But he came to accept the situation in time.

You can't stop other people from having attitude problems, but you don't have to accept them. (I know it's easier said than done.) Your love for your daughter will count for more.

You have a lot to carry at the moment, and you need to make sure that you find time for yourself to relax and recharge as well. You aren't alone, we are here for one another and there are people here who can help and advise better than I can.

Best wishes.

Being a mum is hard work even when things go to plan and they rarely do with any child!  It is ok to feel frustrated worried or any of the other myriad of emotions that you will go through 

I understand that feeling when other parents make comments but you need to let them go as hard as it is the only thing that matters is your daughter. In my case it's the judgment I get for treating my girls differently I used to try and explain that one does not process the same as the other so it was pointless treating them the same now I just ignore them.

Your daughter obviously has a mum that loves her very much and I know it's exhausting trying to keep what you say around your partner limited mine was the same it was pure denial (he has severely autistic family)  and he didn't want to think of our daughter that way but he came around and is now very supportive and if he can so can yours,

You are not alone I think most parents wonder at some point but honestly when I look at my daughter I just think myself so lucky to have her that none of the other stuff matters

Sorry for the rambling, hang in there 

I count myself very lucky indeed to have had supportive parents, especially after reading that, Robert. Must have been beyond terrifying. :( 

As another autistic adult, Starbuck has it right. :)

Yes, school is sometimes horrible because of the reaction of other children, but personally (although I was bullied to the point of being seriously depressed and there are a lot of things about my schooling that were handled very poorly at the time) I also have some great memories of school. My best friend, whom I met at 10, is still my best friend at nearly 30! There are good eggs out there and hopefully your daughter will attract a couple; Autistic people often have an awful lot to offer as companions, to the right people. 

Re. Nursery and general "SEN vs mainstream schooling", I would advise you to follow her lead. There are advantages and disadvantages to both, but if she is settled now I would leave it as it is for the time being. You can always change later if it stops being a viable option. 

Do try to ignore the pity party; they haven't the first idea about what autism actually is and just buy into the (irritatingly negative/demeaning) media portrayal through lack of knowledge to the contrary. Those with experience know better. 

Keep supporting her and keep using the forums whenever you need to; it's a great source of information and support for you both!

You sound like you're on the right track. :) 

Reading your post makes me feel happy that your daughter has a mother that cares.  Just accept her that she is a bit different. Don't behave like my parents.  I have very bad memories from  childhood.

When I was around six or seven, I remember my mother crying with despair, not knowing what to do with me. And smashing my head against the kitchen wall.

You didn't offend me, so not to worry - it's more that autism is seen as such a tragedy, when in a lot of cases I think we make it a tragedy.  Being autistic can be very lonely and isolating at times, so it is always important you have someone to turn to and support you and having a great supportive mum is normally a good place to start.  There is a lot of misconceptions surrounding autism, so you will get a whole mix bag of responses - just ask the adults on this forum!  That's not to say that things won't change for the better in the long run though.

As for kids - they are cruel, not getting away from that one, but as you have already said, it is pointless worrying about something until it is a real problem rather than something you are just anticipating.  Again, if your daughter knows you are always there to support her, you will make it through thick and thin.

Your ex needs space and probably time, but that doesn't excuse him from his role as a parent and support network.

Thank you for your reply and I truly am sorry if I offended you with my choice of words, I’m good at that thinking before I speak! My daughter is the most amazing wee girl I have ever met & I love her more than I thought was possible lol it’s just a big worry I have how other kids will be but I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. I’m very open in discussing the reason she is the way she is but it’s the reply I get as if it’s really such a bad thing when I know it isnt atal.. before I was faced with this i was very ignorant to autism I really had no clue what it was etc. He is an ex partner And believe it or not this is the reason why, because its all my Fault he’s been lashing out which is totally unacceptable. So it’s juat me and my daughter at home and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

It's easy for me to say this as I am Autistic and don't have children, so I can't say I can relate to your situation as such, but I can imagine it is a lot to take in.  However, be thankful that your daughter is healthy and happy.  We are not the easiest to raise at times - my mother reminds me of that!  But this whole point scoring between parents when they compare their children is madness to me.  The children are the ones left suffering for it.  Does it really matter that people notice she acts differently at times?  She is alive and well and that in itself should be celebrated.  If other parents feel the need to draw attention to it or make negative or pitying suggestions, then they are only doing it to try and make themselves feel better.  Everyone has dramas and crises behind closed doors - the perfect family is anything but.

You will probably find that your partner is trying to take it all in and come to terms with it in his own time.  It might be worth getting an ASD specialist to try and explain ASD to your partner and see if he can understand how your daughter views and interacts with the world.