Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, thank you for taking the time to read this post. With great sadness my marriage has reached its end and we are currently simply staying together for our 10 year old autistic son. Has anyone here experienced divorce with an autistic child? Staying together out of fear is making our situation worse, any advice would be amazing. Thank you.
My first marriage finally collapsed when it belatedly dawned on me that staying for the sake of my eldest son was nevertheless damaging him because of the constant rowing between his parents.
At the time, we didn't know our son was autistic, and I didn't know I was, either(!)
The divorce was acrimonious, and it cost me everything I had. I am still making maintenance payments, even though son #1 is now twenty years old.
Marriage #2 feels like it's on its last legs. Our son is probably on the spectrum. I just don't think my wife wants to be married to someone autistic. She wants me to be less autistic by somehow learning to be normal. Somehow, the future seems like a bit of a forgone conclusion.
I am the sole source of income for the family, will I be wiped out in terms of money? It never crossed my mind that I could loose my business, home and family in one moment. How would the law go against me in terms of maintence, mortgages etc? Fear is now complete panic! Err help?
You seem only concerned with your potential loss?
What about your son?
does he matter?
i do not mean lawyers or solicitors,,, You suggested he get some legal advice quick! Will that benefit the child or his pocket?
you assume his partner may be all out to take everything! ( bargaining chips) Why? Maybe she is the one who doesn’t want a divorce? To suggest she will take it all in some way is wrong... no facts,,, other than his concern about living rough... he will pay according to his income and outgoings,,,, fact... not always perfect,,,,
I thought only of the child,,m the marriage isn’t working,, we do not know why,, even if the op tells us it will be his version of the truth....
Ok I feel I have missed the point... I assumed the op came here to seek help and guidance on how best to help an autistic child through the divorce,,, you seem to be focusing purely on money,,,wealth,,possessions,,,who gets what,,, the blame game,,, who did what,,,
This is not a divorce guidance forum for neurotypical, the op does not say he is autistic, therefore he should state wether he is or focus purely on understanding his child’s forth coming needs.
) ( said:regardless of who WINS
You mean the lawyers/solicitors then.
[kinda odd that soliciting is a crime...]
) ( said:he also clearly tells how it would be best if both parents work together to achieve the best outcome
This is all very well in theory. In practice, attempts at magnanimity may simply be used to press home an advantage. If your ex just wants to see you in sack cloth and ashes and is prepared to use children as a means to that end...