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Hit rock bottom.please help.....

Debs75

Hi. ...

I will try keep it short.  Just really need some support

First time in my life .   I was scared of my 14year old son.

He was in a rage.....normal unfortunately...slowly slowly months at

A time getting help.too long go into it....Just say his got autism and

Major anger issues.

Well after being very insulting to his sister, I over heard and stepped

In. Than he went full on  at me .....He called me things u wouldn't

Call your worst enemy.....Than he went to hit me......not unusual

But he wanted too....He ment it...He went to hit me....I stopped him. But really wanted too.....I'm horrified......am so soul destroy

His thrown stuff before....but he wanted to hurt me....

If i ask for help ......Will he get taken away from us ?????

In the end I had to call his dad upstairs to help....

I'm no push over.....but I'm so disappointed.......I'm begging

For anger help for him.....as I love him,with all my heart....this stops now tho

  • Hello,

    your son sounds a lot like me when I was 11ish. I didn't understand the meltdowns. I was not in control. I was fighting the anxiety and loosing.

    I hit it i raged and smashed and hit people I care about. I didn't love them any less. I didn't mean to hurt them. I needed thier help to get back into control. The world can be so scary and overwhelmimg.

    in mine case I did go into foster care. That way i managed to get some help. It worked out well. I was suppose to go home but I was happier in my new school.

    These days I work for the BBC and own my home in london. I have a cool job and the autism is still part of me but under control. I have code on almost every page and built late parts of iPlayer radio. 

    i know social service won't listen unless you shout and shout. My parents shouted too but I am glad they stopped when they did. 

    In summery;

    - try not to read to much meaning into what your son is doing  The driver is probably frusration and anxiety not anything to do with you.

    - social services will probably help. If restbite care is what you both need take it. Let the situation calm down and come back to it in the future.

    I hope that helps,

    Jamie + Lion

  • Hi,

    A big thank you to you all....it's so hard !!!

    Thank you....another issue I'm up against is our son can't sleep....I'm like the living

    Dead,and his fine. It's now 23:42 and his still moaning and  calling me !!!!!!

    I'm sooooo tired....

  • No he wont get taken away from you if you ask for help.

    I have a lot of problems with my 8 years old being agressive and wanting to kill himself, last week at the end of my tehter having nobody listen to me i took him to casualty after he wanted to get at the knives to kill himself.

    The doctor has reffered us to socail services for respite, i belive it gets passed straight to the disability team, and apparently they are supposed to be great.

    The trouble is we only ever hear the negative stuff about socail services, not all the good stuff they do.

    Dont ever be afraid to tell the truth, i spent to many years thinking that.

  • ... Except my son is 10, not 14. I can absolutely relate to what you're saying. My son lashes out at me aswell. Last week, he used something to hit me for the first time. Ok, it was only a cardboard box, bit it's still so upsetting.

    My son is also *always* in a rage. He insults his brothers all the time. Things are so difficult at the minute. I'm a single Mum and I'm exhausted. So please please don't think you're going through this alone... Because you're not. And it's comforting for me to know that I'm not either...

    x

  • Hi Debs75,

    I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling with getting support for your son at the moment. In terms of your son's aggressive behaviour, you may want to speak to someone on our helpline who can provide you with further support/advice http://www.autism.org.uk/our-services/advice-and-information-services/autism-helpline/how-to-contact-us.aspx This helpline is not available at the weekends, so in the case of an emergency/crisis with your son's mental health, we would recommend dialling 111/taking him to A&E if he is at risk.

    There's a part of our website which shows some common behavioural problems that people have contacted us about with further advice http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/understanding-behaviour/common-questions-answered.aspx We also have a helpline enquiry form that you can specify for behaviour https://www.autism.org.uk/our-services/advice-and-information-services/autism-helpline/helpline-enquiry-form.aspx 

    Another helpline you could contact if you wanted to is the Young Minds charity, they provide support on emotional/mental health problems including behaviour http://www.youngminds.org.uk/for_parents/parent_helpline Again, this helpline is available on weekdays but not the weekend.

    I hope that this information may be of use to you but if you need more help or advice then please don't hesitate to contact us.

    Sofie Mod