Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all :)
You may have seen a topic i prerviously posted very recently about my boys. Im a mom of 3. I have got my one boy through alot of the process to the point they have said its Autism and ADHD but it hasnt been put on paper as yet as hes yet to see a phsycotherapist and my other son hasnt even got to first screening yet. This in mind, I have so many questions, so please forgive me as no matter what i read it seems so vague. My main question being if this is the case, does my nearly 6 year old son know? is he aware of his autism and ADHD? If not when do they become aware of it? do you tell them or do you not say anything at all ( i wouldnt until it was on paper anyway). Also my one son has alot of hitting, bitting to others and himself, he uses baby talk and grunts, these things sometimes make me wonder is all this behaviour completely his condition OR is some of it just an average nearly 6 year olds behaviour? Im very confused. I know alot of the things he does isnt that of someone his age but say like when hes boundary pushing is that the nearly six year old or is it part of the condition or both? the reason i ask this as im so worried about time out if its something that cant be helped, in fact should i be time outing anyway? Im in a place where im questioning everything he does (not to him like i just think is this his way of saying i cant cope or is it him just being a head strong nearly 6 year old?) , im questioning everything we do like should i time out if his behaviour is unacceptable (but then it might not be his fault and so i dont want him to feel misunderstood). I often wonder if he knows as im scared that he might feel alone or isolated and i really dont want that. I mean he seems happy enough until hes in one of his outbursts but i am a worrier and the thought of them feeling misunderstood for even a second turns my stomach. If theres anyone out there with autism / ADHD or both a point of view and advice from you would be greatly appreciated as i just want to understand and do the best for my boys. My boys havent changed overnight and i would like to think that i know them every inch of the way however if theres anything i can do to understand the way they see the world then that can only benefit them surely? thank you for reading my post, and thank you in advance to anyone that can contribute, it means alot. Best Wishes, Lisa :)
Oh no :( i bet your moms feeling your pain for you too, the pair of you are really going through it eh? I would deffo speak to your mom and ask he to ask the school for a leaflet on the schools complaints proceedure and go through it. but always keep everything. The MP may possibly redirect you to the complaints proceedure if you havent done this already, (its a way they get out of dealing with it personally i think) Its disgusting what you are having to put up with! I know its a bit extreme and all but is home schooling an option? have you spoke to NAS or CAMHS to see if they can help? Its a pity someone more 'professional' couldnt overhear these rude teachers! Yeah another school would be a really bad move for you, and anyone else at this part of their lives to be fair as its not long before Uni, so to go through the upheaval is really not worth it if you can sit it out a little whilst your mom tries to sort it out. Uni should be an excellent place for you! doing subjects you love, having freedom its going to be great! Ive never been to Uni, I wasnt clever enough unfortunately. I have lots of other grades that are equivalents to like A level but I learn better in my intrest subjects, else i just switch off and cant engage my brain (and then i wonder where Brad gets it from!) I know alot who have gone to Uni though and have loved every minute! I can imagine settling into a new routine may be hard but once youve mastered that and new friends (although some might come from your school?) you will be loving every minute of it! Take no notice of nasty remarks.. I tend to think people like this do so either because theyre jealous, have no life, having a bad day, or are generally bad people inside, so my view is well why would i actually care what someone like that thinks?? and as for the teacher pointing out you hadnt got the shape of the skull right you might like to tell them as they point.. theres always 3 fingers pointing back at them.. in others words if you have got something that they want done different and you havent got that message thats their fault.. its THEIR job! :D cheeky i know but true! Brad complains sometimes that the teachers dont listen to him, So instead what we do is have a laugh about it.. sooo say like Brad is inseperable from his brother but at the mo theres a fence that seperates them and if brad goes near the fence to shout Callum he gets told off, brad got upset on the way home from school so we had a giggle and i said, oh my brad i think she needs a chill pill to which he burst out laughing so next time he does it he then thinks of happier thoughts like her taking a chill pill hehehehe! I dont encourage bad behaviour however i dont see the point in the pointless rulings that schools sometimes make, i mean he only wants to say hello to his brother?? Brad has the same teacher all day, sometimes he her friends sometimes hes not, i suppose it depends how long he spends in her class or out in his daydream land he he he! ;D but im sure as he gets older he too will be more vocal about his likes and dislikes with teachers :) i know he loves the learning mentor, but she is brilliant and very supportive im so glad he has her :)