Please help I get called names and I don't know what to do

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Try to Look on the bright side Ruby i know its dificult to imagine, trust me i was their once.

After you leave School more opertunities open up trust me, and that waste of space and his mates will see no more than the inside of a prison cell that is built for these sort of people.

I'm 29 now and would give him the beating of his life, you make sure you don't rise to this stupid behaviour and make sure you do things that Please you.

I'm sure i speak for everyone on this website when i say 'keep us updated'

And don't forget no matter how little you feel it concerns you don't be afraid to ask, the worst you could get is no answer.

all the best an kind reguards Steven.

well done you

Hi Ruby from what I've read you have great courage, even more than i had at that age.

In my mind you have nothing to apoligizise for and if i was in that position i would knock the living crap out of the cowards.

Thank you to all of you, you are all seriously wonderful! 

Dr3am3r, today at school I went to a member of staff and asked her about it and she said I could talk to her any time even over a tiny thing and she was shocked over the boy's behaviour, so I'm extremely glad that I took your advice and I hope your son gets diagnosed soon :) 

recombinantsocks and Escher, I will try really hard to just ignore him and stay with my friends so that it will be easier to ignore him.

Marjorie195, I'm sorry that that happened to you and I'm glad that things improved although it took a long time. I have about four friends, but they take different subjects to me, so often I have to walk around the school on my own which gets scarier every day. I'm sorry but I don't understand, if I see anything like what happened to the 13 year old boy, how am I meant to just let them be hurt?

Thank you to all of you for your support, if there were more people like you around then the world would be a much better place :)

Hi Ruby. I think that what you did is magnificent, looking out for someone younger than yourself is a great thing to do.

I was once in this position, when I was much older than you. I stood up to someone I worked with, who was bullying someone else I worked with. Just like you, the bully turned their attention to me, and I then became the bullied person.

This was a horrible situation to find myself in. No one believed me, at first. My doctor decided that I was paranoid, and my family believed my doctor. At work, I eventually convinced someone, and after a long time, things improved.

You do not say how many friends that you have around you, to support you in this situation. People with autism often have very little support, so when the bully attacks, they have no help themselves. You need to obtain help from your school, the police if need be, and any medical support available to you. Tell all of them exactly what you did, and the result it has had.

I will say again that you did a wonderful thing for that 13 year old boy, and he was probably greatly relieved and thankful that you helped him, but if you see anything like this in the future, don't be a hero, just report it to someone stronger than yourself, and better placed to deal with it.

You will always find support here. Remember the old saying:-

Sticks and stones may hurt my bones, but words can never hurt me.

Best wishes

Well done, Ruby!

It sounds as though he is not clever and he probably comes from a family where the children are not well behaved and they may not respect the police or other people in society. It isn't your responsibility to fix this - autistic people have a tendency to try and take on things like this but try and step back and let the authorities deal with him. Try not to react because any reaction will probably encourage him to keep doing things. Try not saying anything and don't hit him! Make notes of exactly what happens with dates and times and exactly where you were.

Have you discussed this with your mother? If you work out a strategy together you will be able to support each other.

Thank you so much for all your replies, you're all such kind people! :) One thing I don't understand is that after the police and the school told him to stop calling me and the rest of my family names, he still did, so I'm still worried that he'll show up at my house again. I don't know how to stay calm in case he calls me a name again because it sounds really petty but it makes me uncomfortable, do any of you have advice on what to do if he calls me a name again? Because I'm still a bit worried I'll get angry and hit him again even though it's wrong to do.

Thank you for all your great advice, this has made me feel lots better knowing that there are people like you guys! :)

1. good on you ruby for caring
2. you will always find scum in life. try to not worry a 17 year old beating a 13 year old is really unlikely to do anything.
3. do you have a mobile that can record if so learn how to use it.
4. if burk starts again record it. if you believe your at risk call police. its an offence to put you in fear of assault he does not need to touch you.
5. if he uses your autism as a weapon to abuse you. that makes his offence worse.
6. you must not hit him no matter what he wont hesitate to report you. 
7. NOW about school make a formal complaint that he is abusing you. do not let them talk you out of it.
8. if school wont listern complaint to police. police turning up at school will change there mind.
9. remember your a brave person. schools nearly over and your real life is about to begin.

well done for being a fine young woman.

Bullying is a common problem for people with autism. There is a page about it here www.autism.org.uk/.../bullying-guide-for-young-people.aspx

Your school should have procedures and policies for dealing with it. They may also be able to give advice about how to deal with the situation that you are in now.

Hi Ruby,

Sorry to hear about this it isnt a good feeling when people appear not to be bothered about helping you with this type of situation. I am not on the spectrum but i was bullied at school and it is the worse thing a young person can go through. Is there a teacher or support staff you could possibly talk to at all? even an adult within the school you trust, this may help you with how to deal with this boy. If not then what about an adult member of your family going round to the boys house to speak to his parents? There could be a number of reasons why he is doing this, he may have his own challenges that he struggles to deal with or it may be that he doesnt understand that everyone is different and the ignorance of not understanding a person can make him react in such a way. This may not help you at all but hope you feel better for sharing, there is people around that are here for a chat either way x

Hello Atypical. Yes I did but the boy who got hit with the branch is too scared of the 17 year old to say that he did it even though at least 4 people saw it. I hope he changes his mind.

I'm paranoid about him turning up at my house again, since the police told him not to call me names or go to my house again but he is already calling me names again. I feel really uncomfortable at school all the time in case he walks past me so I try to avoid him all the time and I don't know how to respond when I am called something disgusting, because why is he allowed to behave like that? I don't know what the appropriate response is when someone calls me a name. I think he must have problems because I had never talked to him before and now he is denying that he did anything and saying I provoked him all the time which is also confusing as I don't know why someone would lie so much as well.

Also what's upsetting me is that his girlfriend told my friend that she knew someone with a cousin with autism or something really vague like that who lied a lot, and she said therefore I must be lying about his name-calling and spitting on my face and turning up at my house  because I am also on the spectrum. Ignorance like that about autism is just really shocking and distressing, especially as I am one of five children, and three of us are autistic, but we're all completely different children.

Thank you very much for replying to this, it's made me feel a lot better.

Hi Ruby.  Have you told anyone about the boy being hit with the branch? The police and the school may not taken it seriously if they think it's just name-calling.

A 17 year old who hits a 13 year old like that is a coward. Hopefully he will be scared to do more than call you names, because you are older.  But I am worried he may hurt someone.  It may be that he is being nasty to people because he has problems himself. That's not an excuse, but he may need help.

I think you were right to try and help the 13 year old.  You should be proud of yourself.