The secret language hidden behind words…

I dont gesture that much, but only when i'm really passionate. It's like a indicator of how engaged i am. Or how emotionally involved in a situation. Sometimes it's just exaggeration for the sake of it. it can vary wildly. I can be every expressive sometimes, in a performative way almost, since i pick up and model gestures i see and like from famous people. I try to incorporate them sometimes, to make them second nature. You just practice them over and over, and the body will use them, eventually, in social contexts.

Alienatedhuman said:

. I found an article about the importance of nonverbal communication in life and business

Communication is supposedly 80% non-verbal. It's crucial to get it right, yet also hard for us.

Hand gestures are more common with Continental Europeans, especially the Italians.

I find it hard to articulate myself. Though I can speak well. 

Whenever I'm with Hope, I tend to speak to her like she's a kid. My mum was the same with the dog we used to have. 

I’m often told that I look bored when I’m actually interested and I listen deeply concentrated and I remember what was said for long time afterwards but others when they see me staring at one point in space and motionless they think I’m bored. And when I speak I also don’t keep much eye contact I prefer talking while having a walk side by side. When I have a speech (very rarely but I used to have few occasions during my studies) I don’t gesticulate or very little  I just stand straight and talk. I don’t if it’s autistic or just me. Whatever, it’s just me.

I've been told I gesticulate to much I thought this was an autistic trait?

I'm very good at non verbal communication with animals such as cats and dogs, but I'm useless with people.

Alienatedhuman said:

I can’t post what I found idk why I can’t just paste the link here

If you want the content of the article then click and drag the cursor over the text you want and right click - copy to copy the text (assuming you are using a PC that is).

If it is the link then go to the page you want, select the address bar at the top of the page and copy that link (the https:// bit) to paste in your reply..

Thank you, I will read the article you posted, unfortunately I can’t post what I found idk why I can’t just paste the link here

Alienatedhuman said:

I for years tried to figure out why people gesticulate with their hands while speaking. For me it feels irritating, it disturbs me,

My understanding is that the hand movements etc are supposed to clarify the meaning of what is being spoken - emphasising size, force, proximity etc but most of the time the hands have nothing material to support in the coversation and are just flapping about like dogs running around at the park, sniffing trees.

It is quite helpful where there is a language barrier or the other person is having trouble understanding you - it certainly helps me a lot when I'm travelling and my tourist language skills are woefully short of asking if the squid dish is tentacles or the head part - easy to mime with the hands

Funilly enough the more problem the speaker has in being understood, the more the hand gestures step up.

The reason it disturbs you I think would be because you don't understand it. Should you want to correct this there is a good article on it here that can point you in the right direction:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201307/the-neuroscience-speaking-your-hands