# Daily Updates #

I've been peopled out through work this last 9 days, so I'm having the afternoon off!

Listening to Chatterbox - from 2001 'GTA3' - on YouTube.

Memories.

Me time, please.

bummer

migraine

I've been sat in work for 7 hours &

I've done about 7 minutes of work

Watched Lizzie McGuire. Played Mario Kart on the app and Pokémon Go. Listened to music 

My uncle and aunt-in-law came to my home yesterday, and have everything shining. My brother wanted me to stop cooking until the viewings were complete. In the end, I went back to my support bubble's home this morning.

I went to Moneymore this afternoon, to post a mass card for the deceased mum of an old Uni friend. Then my friend went spare at me not waiting for him to make a list. But I'll make it up to him, tomorrow, by taking him for a spin to shop somewhere not-so-close.

I always feel disgusting having to flip-flop; or back down. However, I can't change others. I have an attitude problem, driven my impatience and frustration.

Also, I declared myself unfit for work last Wednesday. My PIP renewal form arrived that day, too. On Friday, I got a supporting letter from my Key Worker. Then, I went for a walk at a forest park outside Draperstown; in a huff.

As they said in 'Four Christmases,' "You can't spell families without lies!"

Now watching..... Farscape. Will do course on emotional uncertainty later and a stint on the exercise bike. I'm building up slowly.

Very weird dreams last night. I never used to remember dreams - perhaps it's a sign I'm allowing myself to process emotions instead of boxing them away. I can link them to Friday's stressors where I just shut down. 

Feeling rested and almost normal now after a day and half of near constant sleep. Head still a bit fuzzy, so I still feel unfocused but in general I'm a lot more grounded and optimistic today. My whizzy fitness band tells me my stress levels have dropped with the needle now a lot further to the left (having spent the last two days over to the right as far as it will go).

The good weather is helping too. As is the cat checking up on me. 

Looking forward to that extra day off tomorrow. I might actually do stuff.

get up at 2am to look after 5 dachshund pups ,normally get up at 4 so not much diff,just had 45 hours heavy rain.

nice to have alone time as normally very busy house with 4 children in it

Watched Marvels Runaways. Played Mario Kart on the app 

fixed a chainsaw then tested it worked again,,  and oil feed was now reworking 

WandaVision,,,,,  I just didnt get it at all !

Went for a walk today. Had a double chocolatey macchiato, sushi for lunch. Watched the latest WandaVision episode and continued watching Marvels Runaways. They’re really good! 

Long, long day. Digital workspace "upgraded". Work transferred. Notice none. FIles lost. Access limited. Nothing resolved. Motivation gone. 

Long weekend 

Had a triage appointment and I'm going to start (in 2-3 weeks) a non-intense computerized therapy for 6 weeks, somewhat based on CBT for Depression and Social Anxiety but tailored a bit more for people with ASD, unsure how it will go, but after 6 weeks if I think it will be effective I can have a further 10 weeks more intense sessions. 

Feel a bit better, just having a plan.

Parks and Recreation. It’s really funny!

Watched tv 

I'm about to be moved at work ... again. 

Don't get me wrong. It's nice to be fought over but sheesh! I've barely been in this role for a fortnight.  

Expanse, Dead PIxels (season 2 now!) and reading the Tain tonight. And 20 mins on the exercise bike (Taking it real slow, really let myself go over christmas)

...and food planning for next week in time for order and  delivery tomorrow. 

bummer