Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm super lonely and looking for people my age(20s) who'd like to do something with me, I am so stressed too I hate feeling like this, I can't sleep. I'm bad with people but being isolated it is driving me mad (it is my fault I suppose I'm a bad person for not bettering my circumstances and meeting people).
Help anyone?
( More from Me. I just looked at Your "Profile Page". Please do not be so negative about Yourself. OR - the BEST advice I can give --- I am quite a "negative" person M'self... but I try very very much to put it in a "positive" (amusing) way. Read a lot of Books or Comedies to see how this is done. (I Myself am a version of Paul Merton and Jimmy Carr, in a way.)
...But if feeling really stressed, do not use "social media" unless it relieves stress, I say. I dare say no more than that. But 'Welcome to this Forum and have a look around and reply to whatever You fancy' is what I usually advise to Newcomers, If You are one.)
Good Fortune to You, "Mr Creature", in anycase. (Thank You especially for having both a UserName and an Icon, not just the generic "NAS12345". )
Mr Creature said:Hi, thank you for responding.
...I do not post that often, yet I see this *now*. (...) Thank You for replying. Please do have a go at starting other Threads as well, stating Your own Interests. I apologise that I am not the best person here to engage with (I hate "chitchat".)...
I post the Thanks, but also prefer that someone else may post better engagement and support. I am soooooo not great at this "Social Media" business...!
...Anyone else? Say something! (I post that request a lot, Sorry! But Please & Thanks, Anyone who reads or responds for doing just that, always! I mean it!)
Hi, thank you for responding. I have youtube, instgram, yahoo and so on, I find so hard to keep track with passwords and just got round to resetting. My main interests are the outdoors, animals, gaming, photography and fantasy/sci-fi. I'm really afraid sometimes because the way I am that I'm going to end up alone.
Mr Creature said:it is my fault I suppose I'm a bad person for not bettering my circumstances and meeting people
...I should add a few things: Do not think of Yourself as a "bad person". I for one also avoid meeting people. But towards "bettering circumstances", that is not always a controllable thing -- just *Learn* from experience, rather than seeing it as "faliure"...
But a main thing which others might suggest here, is to simply post about Your own interests, and You might find someone also interested in them. Apply that to real life as well.
( ...It sure is QUIET here upon this Forum just at this time, or else someone else, as I said, would have Posted something more useful/interactive here by now...?! )
(Greetings. I just Posted a reply to "Ross-Mod", which is also at You, Just to let You know. Maybe others will Post better interaction after this. Meantime, do not let being "socially isolated" become a bad thing, for it is certainly NOT.)
(...Interesting how *that* is suggested, instead of links actually anything to do with KENT.
https://www.autism.org.uk/directory/a-to-z/pg=1~sid=2246063~s=1/resources/734.aspx
https://www.autism.org.uk/kent
...Non-NAS Links are:
https://www.nhs.uk/Services/Trusts/Services/DefaultView.aspx?id=77604
https://www.kent.gov.uk/social-care-and-health/care-and-support/disability/learning-disability/autism
https://www.kent.gov.uk/social-care-and-health/care-and-support/disability/learning-disability/autism/support-for-adults-with-autism
...But "KentAutism" gives My own Device a "Privacy Error".)
...Apart from all of that, I would suggest the common advice of simply letting Interests/Likes/Hobbies drive any "Social interaction", and most of all maintain Confidence and Good Health. Focus upon the Self, and seek out Mutual, reciprocal Support; if "Social Interaction" happens then it is just a side-effect...(!) Seek what not others want from You but what makes You happy to do with or for others... or something...)
(P.S. ...Sometimes on this Forum are a lot of statements saying that the NAS helplines are oversubscibed and are always busy.... Just saying.)
Hi Mr Creature,
I'm sorry to hear you're feeling isolated. We have a page here on the site about social isolation - https://www.autism.org.uk/about/communication/social-isolation.aspx - which has a few different suggestions for ways to meet people, like through the site Meetup which has groups for people with ASD, the NAS befriending service, local support groups you can find in the Autism Services Directory here, and other suggestions. Hopefully one or more of these might be helpful to you.
Best wishes,
Ross - mod