I find a small amount of cocaine and some benzos make me feel normal it is great I find it so easy to talk to people and seem like a normal person it is great
what are your thoughts on this? :)
I used to smoke dope, drop acid, drink mushroom tea and enjoy MDMA. Only occasionally though. I haven’t for many years now - I’m in my sixties. You need to acquaint yourself with the law of diminishing returns, before it acquaints itself with you. It never made me feel ‘normal’. Whatever works for you. I have decided the world needs to adjust to me, not the other way round.
Hi thanks for your reply, I have never had mushroom tea just ate them, they taste disgusting, I prefer LSD to mushrooms, can you communicate better with people now than when you were younger?
Communication becomes easier in some ways as you learn responses through experience. I don't say it's easy. I was diagnosed about four months ago. I imagine that you are a lot younger than me. If I was to offer advice to my younger self, I would say stick to resin, the skunk or bud that's predominant these days has no CBD. The higher THC content makes it more difficult to stop. Moderation is key. I didn't like cocaine because I've seen too many get a problem with it. And it's ridiculously expensive and the the trade is rough and predatory.
I have to agree with Graham, resin is much better for communication.
Have to say I did a bit of s double take when I saw the word 'Bezos.'
I did experiment with mushrooms and similar things in my mispent youth....
Graham said:I have decided the world needs to adjust to me, not the other way round.
I agree. But quite often I need to get out of my head in order to fine tune the adjustments.
Skunk is junk.
I have quite a bit of experience with both. I really wouldn't start messing with the two, especially in tandem. One basically cancels out the others effect, in theory you'll still feel them both but not get the full effect. This will only make you want more of one or the other. If you are getting the benzos from an illegal source you won't have a limited supply you will just be able to buy them at will, same with the coke which you will certainly be getting illegally. In the end you may start hammering both to get a balanced feeling.
I'd say don't do either. I read in another thread you are 21 and have already had a few problems with drugs, cannabis namely. I was an alcoholic for about 20 years and a benzo addict for about 10 but for a phase during that weekends were "Cocaine time". All week I'd go to work and drink Vodka from almost the moment I got up. I'd drop Clonazepam (Klonopin) when the end of work was nearing. I'd be totally fried by the weekend so I'd get an eighth of coke. I'd get to a bar or wherever and I'd already be half gone because of the Vodka and Klonnies. I'd bang a big line of coke up my nose and feel ready for more. After about 7 or 8 pints and a fair few lines I'd be see-sawing between drunk and sniffed up. Never a comfortable point. A coke high only lasts a short time, just over half an hour. Once it would start to feel like it was wearing off I'd be walloping more up my nose to stop me from being fall over drunk.
Cocaine makes even the most meek people over-confident. I can be a pretty snarky, sarcastic *** at the best of times. Coke made me far worse. I got into arguments, fights and general drama I didn't need. Cocaine is very "morish" especially when in a social setting. You will feel shitty after it feels like it's wearing off and probably withdrawn, so you will need more to stay where you are. If you are drinking that see-saw thing I mentioned will end up in disaster. Either the booze or the coke runs out, then you are in the ***. I stopped doing it because I have trouble sleeping anyway and the price doesn't justify the effect to me. I know lots of people my age who have had heart problems or have just dropped dead from heart problems caused by coke abuse. Coke and alcohol especially. That see-saw thing will wreck your heart.
As for benzos I've done most of them. I like anything that slows me down. Started with Temazepam (jellies) at school but ended up with me finding Clonazepam and falling in love with it. Worst thing ever. I ended up emotionally numb, life wasn't worth living. It drove me mad. I've been addicted to a few things but Klonnies were the hardest thing to part from. The reality came crashing in everytime I tried to stop. I've tried every drug around probably apart from Spice and the way Clonazepam suited me was so ******* addictive. It all ended up in me trying to stop "cold turkey" and after a few days swallowing a full box and a *** load of Vodka. I smashed my house up, had glass stuck in my feet and hands but woke up alive. I ended up being admitted to a mental health unit and that made me stop doing everything. That led to my diagnosis too. I used to smoke a *** load of weed too and as people say here the stuff that's around now isn't too good for your head. Some of the weed around feels as strong as Acid to me. I can still get resin or "normal weed", stuff like Redbeard, Ethiopian Red or Yardweed but I don't even do that. I'm trying to adjust to the challenges of my Autism without self-medicating as a crutch.
I'm on meds but I'm only taking the prescribed dose. I was like you at your age. I had a decent job, I had money but I also had free access to pretty much all the drugs I wanted. I'm not being preachy, being young is a time to party but trust me the party can become your everyday life. The party is no fun if you can't leave. It's a ******* nightmare. I'm having to learn to cope at a pretty late age without the crutch I became attached to. Learn your emotions now and don't think a body full of chemicals is you. I'm very lucky, my heart, liver and kidneys survived it. My brain is another thing, learning to cope again has left me with serious anxiety. All the sensory stuff and anxieties that drugs held off are right in my face. I'm learning how to cope. I'll be OK, you will too, just try and get there yourself without the crutch. It's more like a cross after a while mate.
All the best and look after yourself!
Graham said:It never made me feel ‘normal’.
Nope, me neither! I hope whoever's reading this takes heed. I chased "normal" for years through drugs. What a paradox!
There is no cure for autism.
You may be able to temporarily reduce your inhibitions, but not all autistic people are inhibited anyway. Some seem to talk as if they're on coke already. More interaction is not necessarily better interaction, and someone under the influence is not a great judge of their performance. I'm not saying there are no illegal 'therapeutic' drugs; LSD can help disrupt fixed ways of thinking and has the advantage of not being habit-forming. There's a reason why drug companies are trying to develop patented analogues of some of these chemicals. Despite them both being uppers, cocaine has a reputation for being more anti-social, and MDMA for being pro-social.
By the way you can edit the title this thread if you like by clicking on 'More' underneath the head post and then edit. That might save any possible defamation of the CEO of Amazon.