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I hate funerals

Robert124

Is it just me and my specific bad personal experiences of funerals.  Or do people dislike funerals in general ?

For me the whole experience leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

From being invited,. By people I haven't met in years.  The two faced comments by neighbors, the social interaction at the funeral and the list goes on and on.

I will write specific details after breakfast.

  • I've probably been to about ten funerals and only one that was a relative. The others were because we live in a tiny community and when someone dies it's customary for everyone to attend the funeral. I never felt any of the funerals had anything to do with the person who died.

    Some of the people were lovely and some were NOT, but at every single one the minister said what an amazing person the deceased was. It all just feels so fake and ridiculous to me and the only reason I went was to show support to the family.

    I have preferred the ones that just involved the graveside procession as the church part seems even more irrelevant if the person being buried wasn't religious. Out of ten funerals, eight involved a church service prior to the graveside procession and only four of those people were christian. 

    The nicest funeral I ever attended was a neighbours husband and neither of them were / are religious in any way so she kept him at home the night before (just the two of them, as it was when he was alive) and the next day it was just all of the community gathering at the graveside procession. There was no religious leader of any kind and the wife spoke about her husband before reading out a short note he'd written before he died to thank everyone for supporting his wife through this difficult time. It was truly beautiful and heartfelt and I think everyone felt we were sharing a deeply personal moment with our neighbour. That's what i'd like mine to be like, personal and honest.       

  • I usually turn up a few days after funerals, when there's no evangelist clergies around.

  • More details about what I dislike.

    I think it's the social side I don't get.  Like when the gossiping in church.  When one of my unusual neighbors passed away.  Other neighbors at the funeral calling him a nutter and saying we never even knew his name.  They just saw him power walking ten times a day.  I kept thinking if that's how they feel, why did they bother even coming to the funeral?

    Then the formal reception after the funeral and less formal pub get together.  I hate both.

  • I just don't really understand them. I mean, by that point the person in question has gone. I would rather remember them than remember a bunch of people standing around a box .... yeah, often being two-faced. That has nothing to do with the person who has gone. For me the people who have left this world before me are just "in the next room" and I think of them often, but as they were when they were in this room with me.

  • I hate funerals too. I only went to my grandma's and have declined every other invite, including to my grandads in Jan.

    I find it incredibly creepy that tradition dictates that we follow a rotting corpse being driven around the streets to the funeral location. The rotting corpse is then placed in a room whilst everyone gathers around it for the ceremony. At my grandma's all I could think about was her rotting flesh. I don't do large gatherings so missed the wake and went to a spinning class instead. Luckily my family take you as you are and don't care if you follow tradition just because most of society does.