How do people cope with being anxious?
Sometimes it just gets too much and I crumple. But only on the inside, I'm quite capable of not showing it at all and getting on with life, it's just an extra thing to carry quietly.
Music does help me feel calmer at least for a while.
Anyway, apologies.
To continue from my previous reply:
Working on changing your perspective towards your anxiety is a good place to start. Increasing our acceptance and tolerance of the physical sensations of anxiety so that we are less reactive to them, and don’t get caught in the cycle that often gets established of ‘getting anxious about anxiety’ - it can be a vicious circle.
I’ve tried all sorts of things over the years to try to deal with persistent anxiety issues that I’ve struggled with. I think it’s good to approach it from many angles - including fundamental stuff like getting enough sleep, regular exercise, getting outside in the sunshine and fresh air, healthy diet etc. All these things can help. The thing that’s helped me the most is Mindfulness and Buddhist teachings - which I’ve learnt from the teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh and his monastic community called ‘Plum Village’ - who have loads of free talks etc online, and a podcast called ‘The Way Out is In’. It’s also helped for me to have a better understanding of why my upbringing (in quite a dysfunctional family) contributed to my feeling not ‘safe’, and feeling insecure and sensing that I could not cope if something bad happened. Also I had childhood operations in hospital - which I think caused my health anxiety. Mindfulness has helped me to not get too caught up in the past though - and whilst I learn from what happened I now find it easier to let go of any rumination and bitterness about my past, and to be able to be more forgiving of my parents flaws and failings. Similarly Mindfulness has helped me to get less caught up in worrying about the future.
The thing is - it takes time for things like mindfulness to really help, and I think a lot of people don’t persist with it because at first the change is slow. But I’ve found that the longer I practice a more mindful existence in my day to day life the more naturally it comes. It really does help me hugely now. I still have bad days when I’m dealing with my most triggering situations - but I recover from them more quickly, and the bad days are less frequent. I feel the improvements I’ve gained will be long lasting too. My perspective has changed. I also found Eckhart Tolle really helpful too. I’ve struggled with anxiety for about 30 years - so it was a very ingrained problem for me, but these teachings/mindfulness practices have still really worked for me. It’s been about 2-3 years since I first got into these practices - so it’s not a quick fix, but I’d recommend it to anyone. It really can help.
To continue from my previous reply:
Working on changing your perspective towards your anxiety is a good place to start. Increasing our acceptance and tolerance of the physical sensations of anxiety so that we are less reactive to them, and don’t get caught in the cycle that often gets established of ‘getting anxious about anxiety’ - it can be a vicious circle.
I’ve tried all sorts of things over the years to try to deal with persistent anxiety issues that I’ve struggled with. I think it’s good to approach it from many angles - including fundamental stuff like getting enough sleep, regular exercise, getting outside in the sunshine and fresh air, healthy diet etc. All these things can help. The thing that’s helped me the most is Mindfulness and Buddhist teachings - which I’ve learnt from the teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh and his monastic community called ‘Plum Village’ - who have loads of free talks etc online, and a podcast called ‘The Way Out is In’. It’s also helped for me to have a better understanding of why my upbringing (in quite a dysfunctional family) contributed to my feeling not ‘safe’, and feeling insecure and sensing that I could not cope if something bad happened. Also I had childhood operations in hospital - which I think caused my health anxiety. Mindfulness has helped me to not get too caught up in the past though - and whilst I learn from what happened I now find it easier to let go of any rumination and bitterness about my past, and to be able to be more forgiving of my parents flaws and failings. Similarly Mindfulness has helped me to get less caught up in worrying about the future.
The thing is - it takes time for things like mindfulness to really help, and I think a lot of people don’t persist with it because at first the change is slow. But I’ve found that the longer I practice a more mindful existence in my day to day life the more naturally it comes. It really does help me hugely now. I still have bad days when I’m dealing with my most triggering situations - but I recover from them more quickly, and the bad days are less frequent. I feel the improvements I’ve gained will be long lasting too. My perspective has changed. I also found Eckhart Tolle really helpful too. I’ve struggled with anxiety for about 30 years - so it was a very ingrained problem for me, but these teachings/mindfulness practices have still really worked for me. It’s been about 2-3 years since I first got into these practices - so it’s not a quick fix, but I’d recommend it to anyone. It really can help.
It's lovely to hear that you've really managed to learn control, and that after a several years it is yielding good results. Being dedicated to it makes sense, that you need to persevere to actually have a long standing outcome that doesn't just wobble over at the first sign of stress. I've heard you speak of the benefits of Thich Nhat Hanh teachings, but I've not looked it up before. Seeing as I'm wanting to try and change something, I will research it, as I do want to help myself in some way.
If I could sit with the anxiety better, perhaps it won't rule me as much as it does at the moment.
