Bad messages

Size 8 is a normal shoe size in the UK and has been for years, size 9 is no uncommon in womens shoes either. People are getting taller and bigger all round. According the the computer search a 31" inch inside leg is the most common length in UK womens clothes. I think a lot of it is prejudice and mixed with manufacturing abroad, espcially China, where they don't seem to know how to use a measuring tape or use a pattern.

I was told not to advice clients on things, other than maybe to suggest they go to a GP or someone, my role was to reflect back to the client what they were telling me and hope to find some resolution and peace, not to solve all their problems for them. Personally I would not like to advise like you suggest when in a counselling role, nor would I welcome it if I was the client.

You do seem to have the idea that because I was a counsellor 30 years ago, that I have the answer to every problem I come across?

TheCatWoman said:

I feel so upset, it's brought back all the old messages about being to big to be a proper girl

From what you have posted here about your body shape, shoe size etc it does seem that you are a statistical outlier in the sizes used for the majority of womens clothes and shoes / wellies. 

I don't think you can realistically change any of this and the fact remains that you are in the range that is not covered for most mainstream production for the reasons that they probably don't sell enough in those sizes / shapes / lengths to make it profitable for them to do so.

You used to be a therapist so how would you encourage someone in your situation to approach their mental health and not feel victimised?

The issue with the banks is a different one - it is all part of the push to going online with the mobile app so they can shut branches & layoff staff to save money. It is just business to them and you are experiencing the fallout.

Likewise with your therapy experience, this isn't going to change  so how would you encourage a client to aproach a situation where they need to adapt of fall by the wayside and lose access to the service?

They all offer delivery, but then when they don't fit I have to return them and wait for repayment before I can start the whole sorry process all over again, if I'm lucky I might find a pair of sandals in the end of season sales. Shoe Zome stuff has never fitted me.

In the past I've ended up in shoe shops surrounded by half a dozen or more pairs of shoes, none of which fit, having to hold back a melt down until I can at least get out of the shop, I used to live in a town that had loads of shoe shops and this would happen in everyone.

Sadly it won't be the first summer I've spent in boots, or bare feet,. I think part of the reason I have so much foot pain is from years of ill fitting shoes, broken shoes, or no shoes at all.

Yes, fully adjustable walking sandals, I got my from Millets, though other shops are available. 

I’m so sorry ill thought remarks have bought back old memories,  my old Nan used to say, “ if you’ve got nothing nice to say, then say nothing.”
I did google your area and there isn’t really much in the way of shoe shops.

I know you’re not a fan of online shopping but Shoe Zone and Deichmann both offer delivery, all there shoes are available in an 8 and some a 9.

As for banks, I think you was lucky to find one, I see more and more companies with signs, “we are a cash-free company.”

I would definitely stay away from the Mar-a-largo pool party, I’ve heard strange reports!

https://www.deichmann.com/en-gb/c/women/sandals-135

https://www.shoezone.com/Womens?srsltid=AfmBOorYFEka5JAw13sZNKwR8CsFEbGdDW7kJaMHxf6DNdhBvyDPYBPt

Cinnabar_wing said:

I had a pair that are from an outdoor shop

Those sound like they may be the sort of sandals I like to wear now. Places that sell hiking boots and shoes usually do ladies walking sandals in most sizes, although I’ve noticed JD Sports size range is limited.

Have you looked on Vinted? 

No, because womens feet are a different shape to mens

im not up to date with women's shoes, could you buy the same style as a mans shoe?

We don't hae a shoe zone anymore, not that I ever found anything much in there. I can't find any that fit, my feel are just the wrong shape, one of the problems with sports shops, is that many of thier womens sizes stop at size 7, some even smaller and mens ones are the wrong shape, they fall off at the heels. I often find footwear to big around th ankle, if I want flip flops then I'll get flip flops, but there's nothing worse than shoes that aren't supposed to be flip flops acting like them. I looked on amazon at some I've had before and they only had white in the style that fits me, they wouldn't stay white after a couple of dog walks, then they'd just be grubby brown.

I agree the woman was rude, I think it's an appalling thing to say to someone, like your foot size is a choice?

I just can't believe that banks don't allow you to transfet even quite small amounts of cash to someone else, I  mean £40 is hardly going to be money laundering. Everything is just getting so difficult now, I just want to hide and pretend I don't really eixist anymore. Now I face a summer wearing boots, again, I wish I could say that this would be a new experience, but it isn't.

Shoe zone is really good as I'm size 4 or 5.

Also I try on loads of shoes and the staff know there stock.

Plus the shop do offers on shoes and slippers.

I can withdraw any amount of money from the post office and deposit cash/cheques. Also they know me. Unfortunately it's closed on Saturdays which is a shame. I could trek to the next one in another area. Once I did that walking in the blazing sun as had to send documents. 

Im size 8 too, I find Shoe Zone pretty good (hope mentioning a shop name is allowed). Their shoes all go up to 8 in my local store

I'm sorry but that's such an offensive thing to say for a shop assistant. I'm a 7, I mostly buy online, and use the 'filter' to make sure I'm not wasting my time looking at shoes they don't have in my size.  I've never been big on heels, I'm ever so slightly taller than my husband, so when I do wear any sort of heel I'm taller than him. 

What sort of sandals are you after? I had a pair that are from an outdoor shop, with a sturdy flat sole and straps so they are fully adjustable, and can get wet and dry out fast, I've had them for a decade or so as it's not often I wear them.  Shoe shops rarely having anything for women that aren't ankle-breakers. Supermarkets sometimes are good, as everyone else buys the average sizes, and there are sometimes the bigger ones left. I think I got a pair of rubber sandals on amazon (I needed them to wear at the local pool when the kids were doing lessons).

And yeah, I've found bank services are getting really bad, if you can even find a branch (they keep shutting in my area). They are trying to force everyone onto the apps I'm afraid.