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Making up problems

Expecto_Patronum

I'm not this is an autism thing, possibly more of an anxiety thing but I'm aware many people here also share this difficulty. I am terrible for making up something to be worried about and then it locking in as a problem and not being able to stop worrying about it.

Today someone in work made a suggestion they thought would be helpful. I said no but didn't explain why. The person didn't push it and that was the end of the conversation. But I've now completely convinced myself because I didn't give an explanation that tomorrow this suggestion will be forced upon me.

I'm aware this is ridiculous and a waste of energy and am making myself feel for rubbish for no good reason. I've tried so many things to stop my brain spiralling in these situations. I try to distract myself, I try to rationalise, I try to show myself there's more evidence against this thought, I've tried writing it down. I really don't know what else I could to stop these endless spirals. As if I don't already worry about enough of life without adding made up worries to the mix!

Does anyone else struggle with this? Has anyone ever found a strategy that actually works to stop it?

  • in reply to Phased

    I've got a T-shirt (naturally = all identical / multiple iterations) that tell me when I need to flock off, with the birds of the sky.

    Flap, flap, flap.......

    Bless you Phased (and dear Patronum)......I must return to safer air [sadly]

  • in reply to Number

    Everyone's a fruit and nut case in that Suite - agreed :-) 

    hehe lets try to put fear behind us (ohsh1t that's just where it can sneak up from!)

  • in reply to Number

    PS - I fear we are now at risk of being too "ableist" with our interchange here.  Rooks alone know, these days, where "one" might alight, with safety these days!.........I opt for the REALLY high roosts, amongst the mistletoe, WELL out of sight!!  Nutcrackers are frigging everywhere - nes pas?!

  • in reply to Phased

    Nice!......

    You're crow-baring my back-daw!....but I'm a hard nut, to crack.

    Jay the force, be with you.

    Blessing.

  • in reply to Number

    cool - there are other corvids -

    be chuffed  

  • in reply to Phased

    Thanks for the clarification on 'da toons.'  Appreciated.

    Would love to stay longer......but I don't feel "relaxed" here, these days.

    Times (and regimens) change = there are graven, craven ravens in this haven, these days....in my opinion/observations.

    Till m'next interjection......be well.

    Yours

    Number.

  • in reply to Number

    seriously tho' I agree with your analysis  

    It is perhaps rationalised from consideration that when one is vulnerable a lot of effort is expended trying to prevent future harm by predicting what might go wrong..

    Unfortunately this can become a self-fulfilling prophecy as one's behaviour can bias towards the likelihood of it occurring. 

    Furthermore there is a balance between worrying what will happen and actually being open to experiencing what actually is happening and what might be less traumatic future outcomes 

    This seems to be wrapped up with the need for predictability and problems with change that i personally experience in my own aspect of autism.

    maybe one day things will be OK :-)

  • in reply to Number

    "da da daaa, da didit didit didit da da da daaa - ONE STEP BEYOND..." - Madness :-) 

  • Yep, me too.

    I believe that this called "rumination" and experience has it to be a component of personal anxiety and depression.

    In my experience the solution is to find a way of resolving the anxiety and depression.

    Hehe as easy as that...  Of course not!  

    Anyway what seems to work for breaking the rumination process for me is...

    First one needs to recognise one is engaging in rumination and I believe that by writing this you have acknowledged this

    Doing something actively demanding breaks the thought process.

    A wise person told me once that if there is something that troubles one and something can be done about it then do it.  If not then tell oneself that when the opportunity arises to do something about it then one will.  E.g. coming up with something one may do to address the concern.

    It is said also that observing the experience without judging it helps - if like me you are habituated to being hard on yourself this doesn't come easy...

    I think that this is the domain of cognitive behavioural therapy and have found this helpful.  The tricky thing is that like any therapy one needs someone who not only understands the analysis and techniques involved but is also able to impart this skill to others.

    If there was one thing I'd be quick to dump from my personal mental repertoire it would be rumination - I wonder though that if I did so my capacity for "deeper" thought would be lost...

    Anyway...

    Best wishes

  • In the words of Madness (or was it Bad Manners) = "One step beyond!"

    For a good-wee-while, I think I actually created problems.......just so I had something to solve/think about!?

    "Next-level" foo ked up mate.