Hi,
I’m not really sure what I’m asking but lately I’ve been feeling like I’m strange. My child was diagnosed as autistic at age 4 and they’re my absolute world. One thing I’ve noticed though is that I haven’t got any room for friendships other than one or two. If people from the past (feels like an entirely different life) get in touch I feel so anxious and don’t really know how to talk to them anymore so I completely avoid it. I reply if I get messages but I feel like I’m an alien as I don’t really feel like the same person they knew anymore.
Ive always found socialising exhausting but used to manage it but they somehow always fizzled out. Now I feel like I have absolutely nothing to give anyone and I dont want to compare or describe my life as it can be really difficult at times and everyone always talks about everything they’ve achieved or what amazing things they’ve been up to and 7 years later I’m still doing the same - supporting my child. Which I love doing but I feel like I’m a bad person because I’m not constantly chatting with them all. I feel like I should want more friendships and keep in touch with people like everyone else does - but I’m so exhausted and don’t know how to or feel I can.
sorry, basically just a ramble.