Guilt and work

From my personal experience I have been through some tough times with finding a job as an autistic person. It does lead to some level of embarrassment and fear and anxiety/guilt all these negative feelings which I have felt. Sadly you might just have to accept and let go I know it's hard but you can only try. It's really unpleasant feeling and reading this It feels like most people can understand me and sense the pain or deep feeling. 

I have at times had people constantly repeating themselves saying to me "get a job" or just I feel like at times going round in circles which is really hard. What helps me to stop these awful feelings is having a good friend to speak to and integrate with that will help your situation in most levels.

Has anyone has this experience before but have you gone through some level of arrogance with other people acting like their better than you because they are working and that they have a job. It's a really hard feeling to deal with this and dampens your self esteem only if you allow it to happen.

I can only apologise about what your going through, it totally feels real and normal but also horrible one of the worst things I have been called weird in the past and constantly patronised about now having a job. It leaved me feeling sad and paranoid and every night my head when it hits that pillow I can't fall asleep I am thinking why can't I do this normal one thing?

hope this helps and if anyone can relate please reply.

Its the not wanting that hurts...like why should i get away with it. It feels like im fighting the world to have it my way...its made me feel i cant be me anymore in case someone says im fine

So you almost feel like you have to fit in with the world to have a job and work ?

I feel like i dont want to...but also i cant fathom coping with it...so i feel like a fraud loving off others with no built in survival instinct like others

You feel like you have to be a normal person In order to have a job is that what you mean?

So its like fitting fhe world to  y narrative and block it all out

Your not the kind of person to back down , you sound resilient

You also do want to work but you can't?

It feels like ive always saught a way out of life...responsibility. or like i thought it was ok to not work and just live. But as time went on and noticing cost of thinngs my mind began to panic...and ive paniced all my life...never taking anything on and hoping it was ok. Now i feel like someone who has chosen to win at doing little like some cruel joke

It feels like ive always saught a way out of life...responsibility. or like i thought it was ok to not work and just live. But as time went on and noticing cost of thinngs my mind began to panic...and ive paniced all my life...never taking anything on and hoping it was ok. Now i feel like someone who has chosen to win at doing little like some cruel joke

I feel like i dont want to...but also i cant fathom coping with it...so i feel like a fraud loving off others with no built in survival instinct like others

You feel like you have to be a normal person In order to have a job is that what you mean?

So its like fitting fhe world to  y narrative and block it all out

Your not the kind of person to back down , you sound resilient

You also do want to work but you can't?