I'm new to this.

Haha, that girl sure sounds a lot like I am! I'm a person who doesn't necessarily want to associate with others, however at the same time, I just cannot do it. I am that used to being lonely, or just being alone in general, that I've given up caring; I'd rather just be alone and deal with it. 

This is online community has given me reason to associate with others as they're understanding: people who don't understand why 'I won't/can't associate or socialise' with others immediately piss me off. 

Im certainly one of those like her! I'd give her a high-five quite frankly haha. 

Thanks for the reply.  I think you realise that for unusual people like us, socialising is difficult.  That lady was in fact the first female of a similar age to me that I could actually talk to.

I have lived in many places, with parents, in flats alone, and shared houses.

Back to her.  At that time I was a student and when I moved into that house i tried to be friendly, saying hello to the other tenants.  She was the only one there that  I made any connection with.  She gave me a brief background to herself, how she suffered a complete nervous breakdown in her last job, been sectioned under the mental health act, diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic and her attitude was, this is who I am! If you don't like it F OFF!  

Hi Robert,

I do apologise for the such late reply - I was adamant to remember my login details, haha!

I know exactly how you feel. My past is also an utter mess; in fact I've come to the conclusion that whether I'm 19 or 49, I'll always be living in my past as the confused and victimised 10-year-old I was. 

I have never been in a social situation being in a shared environment but I can imagine how daunting it could be. Was she possibly looking out for you? I don't think she meant the 'bigger mess' statement in a bad way toward you. I say uncalled-for statements like that to people without realising it.

I hope you did manage to go and see a psychiatrist - all the merrier, they say.

Hi Deepthought, 

I was also diagnosed with Schizophrenia (or psychosis) at a younger age before being diagnosed autistic. The diagnoses, however, are being very mistaken because apparently Schizophrenia is a symptom of autism; which from a family-friend who works in a Ban 6 in mental health says otherwise: my life and my diagnoses are extremely confusing and it's yet still difficult to take in what I (actually) have got. 

Since then, my family (mostly my mother) has come to the suspicion I have BPD or some form of bipolar disorder, which in theory, I do suspect myself I have and the consultants never diagnosed me.

This site, of which I've known for ages, has come to me as 'feeling normal' associating myself with others - that's one thing I cannot do, at all! I do enjoy getting responses and logging in to look at the amount of people who are in same or similar positions to me. 

I also feel almost normal on this site and identity with many of the people here and their problems.

My past is a complete shambles.  I only make a connection with unusual people.  Many years ago when I was living in a shared house i made friends with a woman who had been released back into the community ( she was a diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic). After she got to know me, she was advising me to see a psychiatrist, saying that I was in a bigger mess than her.

Hi Paige,

Welcome to the site. I got diagnosed with Shizo-Affective-Personality-Disorder when I was twelve, which was not so befitting, then referred for Aspergers Syndrome and diagnosed with ASD in 2015, when I was 44. It took me a bit of getting used to, and this site has been particularly useful in coming to terms with things. I hope you find it useful too, and that you enjoy makimg contact with others here also.

One thing I have really enjoyed here - is the wierdness of the 'I know exactly what you mean' aspect of discussion, and actually feeling 'individually' normal - ish.