Pathological demand avoidance

Hi Stilllearning

Don't allow your situation to get as bad as mine did.

Do gather as mush info on PDA as possible and take it to the school/doctor/anyone else who will be involved with your child.

Push/Insist on assessments

Don't allow your child to become so anxious that he starts self harming!

Always stay calm at home so that they feel safe - even when they are challenging you - remind yourself it's a symptom (not them) give loads of hugs and reasurance and remind them everyday that you love them and are watching out for them.

If it is PDA and not supported in the right way, please be aware that he may get much worse - My son has been damaged by mistreatment.

Keep a diary of everything that happens that you are concerned about - everyday - every single little thing that you find odd otherwise you will forget all the detail.

Keep copies of ALL paperwork from educational psychologists or any agencies that the school bring in to support him (which they may eventually do) but you have to nag them (constantly) otherwise nothing gets done.

Remember make it your mission to gather evidence - so that eventually you can push or insist on an EHCP but you will need the school to back you up and lots of paper based evidence.

Stay focused in what you need to gain and push push push - You will need to ne your son's voice!

Try to always remember that you are not alone - don't let them make you feel bad - I know it's hard - I've walked your road and I really do know and understand how crippingly lonely it can be ... You know your son - and you know that he may be on the autistic spectrum - because our children are "high functioning" and exellent at masking to get through the day it's feels like you are fighting a losing battle - but you're not!

Take in website addresses and tell them to educate themselves!

Please don't feel helpless - I and many many others are paddling in the same boat - if you need to vent please just contact me if you need some support or just a chat - or to simply know that you are not alone.

My name is Gail and you can text or call me if you need to on [removed].

I sincerley hope that your situation doesn't get as bad as mine did.

Things are so much better for us now that I've modified my ways to fit around my sons needs - plus he goes to a special school now so copes much better!

I never get angry with him now - always keep the vibe in the house nuetral if I can - it really helps - plus he's 13 now - but boy has he been through it (and me) I take antidepressants I won't lie - but they do help - How I haven't had a breakdown I don't know! My head was so confused and with teachers, health professionals and even the doctor not believing is almost too much for anyone to bear!

Please don't give up - Stay strong - Stay positive and focussed and remember to collect evidence!

Let me know how you get on with CAHMS 

Gail x

Hi Stilllearning

Don't allow your situation to get as bad as mine did.

Do gather as mush info on PDA as possible and take it to the school/doctor/anyone else who will be involved with your child.

Push/Insist on assessments

Don't allow your child to become so anxious that he starts self harming!

Always stay calm at home so that they feel safe - even when they are challenging you - remind yourself it's a symptom (not them) give loads of hugs and reasurance and remind them everyday that you love them and are watching out for them.

If it is PDA and not supported in the right way, please be aware that he may get much worse - My son has been damaged by mistreatment.

Keep a diary of everything that happens that you are concerned about - everyday - every single little thing that you find odd otherwise you will forget all the detail.

Keep copies of ALL paperwork from educational psychologists or any agencies that the school bring in to support him (which they may eventually do) but you have to nag them (constantly) otherwise nothing gets done.

Remember make it your mission to gather evidence - so that eventually you can push or insist on an EHCP but you will need the school to back you up and lots of paper based evidence.

Stay focused in what you need to gain and push push push - You will need to ne your son's voice!

Try to always remember that you are not alone - don't let them make you feel bad - I know it's hard - I've walked your road and I really do know and understand how crippingly lonely it can be ... You know your son - and you know that he may be on the autistic spectrum - because our children are "high functioning" and exellent at masking to get through the day it's feels like you are fighting a losing battle - but you're not!

Take in website addresses and tell them to educate themselves!

Please don't feel helpless - I and many many others are paddling in the same boat - if you need to vent please just contact me if you need some support or just a chat - or to simply know that you are not alone.

My name is Gail and you can text or call me if you need to on [removed].

I sincerley hope that your situation doesn't get as bad as mine did.

Things are so much better for us now that I've modified my ways to fit around my sons needs - plus he goes to a special school now so copes much better!

I never get angry with him now - always keep the vibe in the house nuetral if I can - it really helps - plus he's 13 now - but boy has he been through it (and me) I take antidepressants I won't lie - but they do help - How I haven't had a breakdown I don't know! My head was so confused and with teachers, health professionals and even the doctor not believing is almost too much for anyone to bear!

Please don't give up - Stay strong - Stay positive and focussed and remember to collect evidence!

Let me know how you get on with CAHMS 

Gail x