hi im new

Hi - my son is 14 and has asperger, he hates any sprays/strong scents - have you tried a deodorant stick?  Also, would he consider washing with cleansing wipes, not ideal but you get to learn anything is worth a try. R X

Just joined here but my brother is the same. He is 15, just diagnosed at 14 with Austism as well as ADHD. He just will not bathe, shower or wash. He will do it only if something is in it for him, and it's about maybe once every 2 months, 3 months he bathes. We cannot physicallyforce him as anyone would know. 

Like I said a little while ago...we are new to this.....even tho we have been dealing with our sons issues for years...he only got diagnosed few myths ago.

I feel he goes to school smelling the kids are going to rip him a new one....the poor sods had enough in the past....he was bullied in th past....I don't want him to get bullied again or anyone else...

Please .,I thank you for your answer....It's a weight taken off my shoulders to know it's not our,or our sons thought really.....we love him to bits...

Believe me we have changed everything to help him....It's still a learning in progress

For us all.

I thank u for your point view

Been helpful.....to talk x

Also, you say that "he stinks". I'm not sure if you have used these or similar phrases with him, but if you tell him that he "stinks" this will sound like a personal attack. This may reduce the likelihood of him listening to you.

I understand that you are posting here because you are finding the situation difficult. What is it that you are finding difficult? Do you object to his decision not to wash regularly, or are there further implications for you or others in your household? Have you been able to understand his perspective? He may, for example, have sensory difficulties e.g. finding it painful to take a shower due to the sensation of the water on his skin, or finding the scents of deodorant intolerable. Perhaps the clothes he is wearing are comfortable and so be doesn't want to change them. Or maybe the pressure from having everything tried upon him is too much.

As you will realise, you cannot force him to simply go along with your preferences for him. But understanding what makes it difficult for him could be helpful in and of itself. There are no guarantees, but it could lead to even a partial resolution.  For example, if scents and showing are intolerable, he may manage washing the essential body parts with plain water, having enough comfortable items of clothing available could make it possible to change them at an agreed frequency so that residual body odour on clothing is minimised.

In the absence of other responses I have shared my thoughts in an attempt to be helpful. I do not have children, but I have been a 14 year old (and now an adult) who does not simply accept being told what to do and who has found it useful when someone attempts to understand me and not compel me to follow their agenda.

Anyone got any ideas ??

To my above post ?

Feel alone with this....

Hi we have tried roll ons sprays powders.....aftershave to be honest he stinks of BO it's awful he really doesn't care less

Doesn't like any contact with the skin with products....even have be careful when I wash his clothes.

Washing will only wash in water....no soaps,shower gels... shapped gels and soaps,soap on a rope,sponges, know brands unknown brands....glitter soap...non smelling soap....strong smelling soap...gels u squeeze qels u pump !!!!

Hi, welcome.  Please tell us what you've tried so far relating to the washing/deodorant.  This will help other posters to reply.