Birthday

Happy belated birthday!  

I love birthdays but prefer to spend them by myself without a party. All the noise and celebrations can be overwhelming so I try to keep quiet and spend it the same as any other day. 

I hope you enjoyed your birthday.

I know what you mean about birthdays. They are SO stressful !! At least it's over and done with now! I hate birthdays because it feels like all I get is fake cards and gifts from my family who don't even like me. The whole thing feels fake and awkward. I feel you ! 

I just ignore the day,and as they say, it's not your birthday anyway,  you have one birthday on the day you were born. The rest ( measured your time ) are anniversaries  .  I ignore them completely. 

Sorry if this is late but Happy Birthday!   

I hope you give yourself the most wonderful treats today and take the time you need. Here is a flower for you on any day, but especially for today. 

Your birthday is a day to be kind to yourself, however you choose to spend it.

Happy birthday - I'm sorry about all the emotions it brings up, assuming they aren't good. Here's a little fact to think on

Today is the feast day of St Joachim, the grandad of Jesus. 

My birthday is in the summer holidays so I don't think I ever had a birthday party as a kid, plus I didn't want one, and certainly never as an adult. I thought I should have done something for my 50th, but I was unemployed at the time.

Wishing you a good day

I'm ashamed to confess that I have never had a birthday party.

When i was younger, up to around 10 I got birthday cards but only from my immediate family.

Iain said:

I recall my achievements over the last 365 days

I think this is important. I have spent too many years just surviving. It is why I felt I was just crossing years off. I was waiting for something, I didn't know what.

Now I've been diagnosed and I'm not so confused, I have to push to go do more stuff. This year, despite the problems, is now better than the last, which is the first time I can say that in 10 years.

This way Jan 1 and your birthday can be moments of success and planning.

Keep a note of successes for review, as your mind will tend to focus on the things that did not go so well. One thing a week gives you 52 things to celebrate.

Treat yourself today. Make next birthday better.

Happy birthday.

I'm not nearly as big a fan of birthdays as my family are - they all seem to get super excited, have parties and lots of fuss around he event which just doesn't appeal to me.

My approach is to have a quiet day without any unpleasant things to do that day (eg cleaning the bathroom, washing the car, going food shopping) and allow myself a few treats along the way.

I also buy myself something around this time - last year was a box of books I bought from eBay (several purchases but eneded up one big box of 30kg) which I then had shipped out to me where I live. I've already read most of them LOL

It is funny how some NTs struggle to see why we aren't as into something as much as them yet when we are into something they are mostly apathetic about it. The world is a difficult place!

To make it feel happier I like to think of it as a milestone marking another year where the system has not got me yet and I recall my achievements over the last 365 days - sometimes it can be great to see just how much has been done. 

If anyone I cared about has left this world in the last year then I like to spend a little time to remember the happy things we did, and all the good they brought. This helps me keep happy thoughts over any pain of loss as I believe they would want me to celebrate their life rather then mourn it.

This can be a little bittersweet but keeping the focus on the positives helps me.

Thank you. I don't have many friends, but my family remembers.

Are you going to take some time today to do something you enjoy (as opposed to feel pressure about the conventions of others)? 

It doesn't have to be a big thing - just something to suit yourself - your gift to yourself to mark managing the day.

Maybe, enjoy eating your dessert first - before you eat your main course dish - it can be anything, whimsical or otherwise, which you have fancied but not tried on a regular day.

Sometimes it can be good to establish our own traditions around the type of a day like birthdays

This year, during my birthday week (not on my birthday day itself as that might be too stressful), I have decided that I will solo visit somewhere I have known about for a long time - but not before had the opportunity to visit.  I am giving myself the opportunity to visit that venue as a gift to myself.

I have decided to make the visit solo.  I like my own company even when there might be people I could have invited to accompany me.  No, I have chosen not to do so this time - solo is my choice.

I want to visit the place on my own terms. 

I want no fuss as I experience the venue. 

I want to be able to pause if I need a break.

None of that "oh, we ought to ..." (some other person's idea of what fun must of course look like for everyone).

If I decide I would like to sit down and just watch the scenes unfold - I don't want someone clockwatching with their running commentary about what we must be risking "missing out" upon.  I don't feel that desperation others seem to do so "got to see everything".

I don't want to hear judgemental comments about things I am actually enjoying observing or experiencing.

No listening to whinging about the weather etc.  (My outlook; is you track the weather forecast as the day approaches and then stow some appropriate clothing options / layers in your rucksack and just get on with your day and adventure).

If I want to wear my noise cancelling headphones and listen to a podcast while I survey my surroundings - so be it.

I don't want people insisting on photos of such a visit.  I want to experience the place and revisit it just in my own memories - not via somebody else's take on what was "important" during the visit.

I know that the venue will have lots of strangers visiting too.  I also know that it is a venue which is Sunflower Lanyard trained and they have a few quiet zones clearly marked around the site.  I have looked at their accessibility information and social story.

Websites like RAC Route Planner and Google Street view help me to feel prepared and to know what I am looking for during the journey.

The journey is much longer than I usually would consider - that is my investment in myself that week.  It is better if I am the driver as the same journey as a passenger would be much more uncomfortable.

Travelling solo, driving myself, if I want to break the journey somewhere - I can just do so, have a coffee or some water and then stretch my legs by walking around for a while.

I will also budget to enjoy a more luxury version of my pack lunch than usual during that excursion.

On the way home; in case I fancy a fish and chip supper - that might be worth a bit of advance research (I will have done a lot of walking outdoors that day - so a treat supper sounds reasonable).

If this style of trip works out OK - maybe something like this can become built into my new birthday-to-myself tradition.

Yeah me too. Makes me sad not having anyone to share it with a bit too. Don't like the attention but also can feel lonely. Then I think to birthday's when I did have someone. Dno it just mixes me up.

Happy birthday and I hope your family and friends remember.  And give you plenty of expensive gifts.

Happy birthday

I can relate to this.

I don’t like birthdays at all, all the fuss and everyone shouting or singing at me lol. I find it distressing and uncomfortable to deal with. I put on a smile and mask my way through it. On my birthday I like to try and stay in my room, chill to some music and draw.

Very much try to keep my head down and enjoy the day as much as possible.

I hope you can manage to enjoy your birthday x.

Happy birthday.

I am not too keen on them either. But it's an excuse to have a nice meal and maybe some wine (normally on my own, but you can't let that stop you).

I used to try and buy myself a present. But now I just buy stuff when I want/need it. Although I no longer want much, at least nothing I can afford.