Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm in my 50s have a adult daughter and pet cats.
I have health problems as well. I.find it extremely difficult to make friends and understand people. I.end up getting hurt and I retreat .At the moment I am very unhappy. I used to have who I thought was a friend who had a go at me for trival thing. I said I needed.space for a bit. And because I wasn't messaging her for a few days , she accused me of snubbing her.
Then she said vile things about my counselling I was having and accused me of being fickle and saying horrible things. I used to go to a craft group but can't now as she goes and turned another against me. This upset me. Stupidly I post it on Facebook and said how one sided the friendship was. It was true. Her moaning about her life etc. Anyway someone saw it ,had a go at me .I took it down and apologise.
However someone's sent her my post and she put a letter through my door. Being horrible and saying I don't have autism, I play on it, . I have been diagnosed. She said I must of managed all this time , I was diagnosed in my 50s. I have struggled all my life. Then she said she is going to sue me for slander. . I am terrified. Felt like ending it all.
Didn't put lies, why is that needing space so bad.
There is nothing wrong with wanting some space. Cut her out of your life and move on. Someone who calls themself your friend and then acts like that isn't worth your time or energy.
I had a support worker a while back who was nasty to me in similar ways to your horrible friend. It takes a while for the hurt to dissipate but it will in time.
I had a cat who I took to the vet a few weeks back. The vet told me he had cancer and would need to be put down to prevent him suffering.
Im looking to make some new friends, so if you wanna talk cats with me, you can send me a PM if you like.
Welcome to the forum, and sorry to hear how you're feeling. It's really hard when relationships go wrong, and all of us on here are likely to have experienced that at some time, so we can certainly empathise.
You need to decide what you are comfortable doing and I'm not a professional counsellor, but if it was me I would destroy her letter and try to forget about her, then re-evaluate everything in my life and see where changes can be made to improve it. You could think about joining a group that do something you are interested in, go to bingo, schedule a weekly trip to the library, etc. Maybe see if your daughter is interested in doing anything with you.
Also, if the terrified feeling persists, talk to your doctor about medication, and counselling if you think it might help. I use CBD capsules for anxiety which you can buy without prescription from Holland & Barrett or some pharmacies.
I hope that we have helped you feel a little better.
I'm very sorry to read that you have been tormented in this way. Doubting someone's autism diagnosis is deeply hurtful, and putting horrible letters through doors is...possibly worth a discussion with someone more informed on whether this type of behaviour can be punished and prevented. But the most important thing is that you're looking after yourself, and knowing that you're part of a community here that will support you.
Hello, I'm sorry to hear about your problems, don't worry she can't sue you for that, shes just angry at the moment, I'm sure she will calm down after a few days. Things will seem better in a few days time it just feels raw for you at the moment. Friendships are always difficult. Just try to do something today to take your mind of it. Things will get better don't worry