Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all, I’m a thirty something year old female. my wife has recently undergoing assessment for neurodiversity and asked me to help fill her the forms out and we noticed that while the ADHD side of things seem to be very like her, the autism questionnaires seem to relate more to me so I have approached my GP for a chat.
I have a long history of mental health issues - childhood OCD, health anxiety, depression and generalised anxiety. I was badly bullied at secondary school to the point of feeling suicidal by a group of friends who I guess we now refer to as “frenemies” and when younger (18) was in an abusive relationship.
I hve been lucky enough to study at uni, go on to get further higher education and have a great job, but I massively struggle with criticism (leads to a crushing depression), I get incredibly paranoid and anxious about things and massively sometimes struggle with social situations (have to have some alcohol etc to be able to cope which I know is maladaptive.) this is not exhaustive but they seem to be the traits that cause me the most distress.
my wife had a breakdown following our sons birth and was sectioned and in a mother and baby unit so I suspect I’m probably carrying some PTSD as well.
I’m really worried that the GP will put this all down to PTSD which while I agree needs addressing (on sertraline and went through IAPT counselling when everything was happening) I think I have definetly noticed my neurodiversity has come out a lot more since all of this happened.
has anyone A) had an occurrence of PTSD which has led to ND traits coming out? And B) can anyone offer any advice how to approach my GP during my appointment? I did send them a rather long email explaining my reasons/situation for them to triage me.
I don’t expect a diagnosis will change much for me, but I think it would help me understand myself more and be a better parent for my son. Especially if my wife is diagnosed as well.
thanks for listening x
Paper. Thank you for this. Yes I also agree - tricky as other conditions involved.
Had a long chat with my Mum this week about it all and she agrees that she initially held back from talking more about my childhood initially as she did not want to influence me in any way but has informed me of several other incidences in my childhood which perhaps showed more ND traits than she had realised following me approaching her to ask what her thoughts were.
I think I probably learnt to mask more in early adulthood etc but the potential PTSD/traumatic events have made me regress in a way to a place where I felt safer (childhood) and perhaps my brain has partially rewired itself due to this and some ND traits have come back up to the surface that my brain had tried to bury. ️
Thank you all for your replies and apologies for the delay in saying thank you. I thought I would get email updates and didn’t, so assumed I had upset/offended by joining this forum without a diagnosis. your useful and insightful replies have been most helpful as well as your none judgemental approaches so from the bottom of my heart thank you all again x
I have quite few conditions and I was diagnosed (probably misdiagnosed) few times. So my issues could relate to these other conditions. But one thing has never changed: my inability to follow and participate in social chit chat. Doesn’t matter how I was, in depressive state or in better shape. It’s persistent my whole life. I could and can not follow and take part in it. Stimming is also a thing that I’ve been doing since I ever remember, even before I was traumatised. Same about my sensory sensitivities. You can take tests, they will give you some insight. For me the best was RAADS because it has a lot of detailed questions and options for answers about the childhood and current situation. I remember as a child I used to understand absolutely everything literally. In my language there is a proverb “to turn a needle into a fork” - to exaggerate. I spent long time trying to understand how you could make fork out of a needle. There is not enough metal in one needle, you would need 100 needles to have enough metal to pour the fork. Only as a teenager I started understanding that there is some different meaning in it. But even now when I see proverbs I have never heard before, I get confused and the first thing I get is the literal picture of it. Like wearing a heart on your sleeve. I know it’s not supposed to mean that you have a picture of a heart on your sleeve but this is what came first to my mind. Only then I googled the real meaning
My advice would be to take some online autism tests. AQ10 and AQ50 (sometimes called just 'AQ') are the most commonly used by clinicians in this country, but the RAADS-R is the most definitive. They can be found here: https://embrace-autism.com/autism-tests/
If you score in the autism range it will give you useful ammunition in persuading your GP to refer you for assessment.
It's a tricky one, because of what you have been through. It could just be anxiety and PTSD. If you think you have autism, then the best thing is to approach your doctor with why you think you might be autistic. Do the AQ50, and take it with you. And then think about what struggles you have, because they will need a justification to refer you. It's not the GP's job to diagnose you, so all you need to do is show that there is reason to suspect autism.
Sam said:don’t agree with your point about looking into the tests beforehand. I would say this could affect the way a person approaches the tests, and could lead to trying to second guess, causing more stress
The reason I do this is because I have heard from so many people who become anxious about the tests and with the huge wait times, that is a very long time to be anxious when it is easy to read up on the tests and understand what they are asking for.
I've not come across anyone saying they got anxious by being prepared though.
Since many of the aspects relate to childhood this gives time to try to recall the events and discuss with family / childhood friends to try to get a fuller picture for the tests and interview.
The tests are largely to identify subective experiences so are a form of fact based on the persons memory and experience. I believe that most people give more accurate answers when prepared as they tend to be prone to "siezing up" when answering on the spot - as if they are under pressure almost.
There is another way to look at it and that is that it is a form of cheating and the strong moral compass many autists have means that they are against it.
I offer up the option and tools but cannot make them do it if they are not willing - it seems a fair choice to offer.
I really like your posts Iain, but don’t agree with your point about looking into the tests beforehand. I would say this could affect the way a person approaches the tests, and could lead to trying to second guess, causing more stress. Everyone being different of course. Personally I would say don’t look up anything about theADOS tests until after doing them…
Re your GP Just be very firm and describe your symptoms that are Autistic.You will probably initially get an NHS 6 year waiting list.At this point you can invoke the right to choose and I then went to a company that assessed me within 8 weeks.
Therapy is alos very useful in the meantime but please keep battling hope this is of some help
NAS94617 said:has anyone A) had an occurrence of PTSD which has led to ND traits coming out? And B) can anyone offer any advice how to approach my GP during my appointment?
I suspect your ND traits were always there but when under significant stress our ability to mask is greatly reduced so it is most likely this which leads to these traits becoming significantly more noticable.
PTSD affects most autists unfortunately - some from an accumulation of smaller events and some from big events. The end results are much the same and these are things that a good therapist will work through with you to "unpack" the experience and steal its ability to be so intrusive in your life.
As for approaching your doctor, just book an appointment, tell them you want a referral and go in with having done some homework.
I would have a look at https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/autism-spectrum-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20352928
make a list of the symptoms you find you exhibit noticably from this list and write a paragraph on each explaining how they exhibit.
Keep this list (probably best to take a photo of it) and take a copy to the GP along with a printout of the web page and tell them that this is the reason for the request. I doubt any reasonable GP will refuse.
Also ask them for the Right To Choose route which will get a private consultation in less than a year compared to up to 4 years on the NHS.
When you do get your consult you can produce the list above to save having to re-remember it all and it will give you time to consider more about the experiences to discuss with them.
Prior to the assessment you may want to read up on the types of test they will give you so you can satisfy your own curiosity and not get overly anxious. You should be able to contact the company and ask them the names of the tests they will provide and the info is largely available on the internet.
This would be what I would do in your situation anyway.