My autistic partner wants my adult sons to leave home..not sure how to handle a discussion without him losing his temper.

honestly.... id say let him leave instead.... your sons have been living longer with you yes? they have more rights there then.

you know your sons longer and likely have better bond and better relation with them. id say stick by your sons and just tell your partner hes free to leave if he wants to.

honestly your situation seems similar to my uncle.... but my uncle was the grumpy partner that didnt get along with his wifes family. he argued and shouted at them alot he upset his wife with how he disrespected and spoke to her entire family, and he always painted himself as the victim when he was clearly out of line even from our perspective of his family. he wasnt ever good with relationships or anything... some people just are not goof for a relationship and are never ready and will cause issues and try break people apart. dont let him cause trouble for your family. and also dont let him cause you mental harm too as my uncle did cause his wife to be severely depressed over all that and caused a family break up and people dispersing and moving houses as he ended up taking the rental which was hers origonally... dont be afraid to tell him to just leave then, put yourself and your family first always no matter what.

and this type of  behaviour is more a BPD thing, of which i think my uncle may have after evaluating his behaviour.... he threatened to kill himself in order to control his wife against his kids and guilt her... thats a BPD thing when you look it up. you should look BPD up and try figure out if he has that as that is the bad one for relations.

honestly.... id say let him leave instead.... your sons have been living longer with you yes? they have more rights there then.

you know your sons longer and likely have better bond and better relation with them. id say stick by your sons and just tell your partner hes free to leave if he wants to.

honestly your situation seems similar to my uncle.... but my uncle was the grumpy partner that didnt get along with his wifes family. he argued and shouted at them alot he upset his wife with how he disrespected and spoke to her entire family, and he always painted himself as the victim when he was clearly out of line even from our perspective of his family. he wasnt ever good with relationships or anything... some people just are not goof for a relationship and are never ready and will cause issues and try break people apart. dont let him cause trouble for your family. and also dont let him cause you mental harm too as my uncle did cause his wife to be severely depressed over all that and caused a family break up and people dispersing and moving houses as he ended up taking the rental which was hers origonally... dont be afraid to tell him to just leave then, put yourself and your family first always no matter what.

and this type of  behaviour is more a BPD thing, of which i think my uncle may have after evaluating his behaviour.... he threatened to kill himself in order to control his wife against his kids and guilt her... thats a BPD thing when you look it up. you should look BPD up and try figure out if he has that as that is the bad one for relations.