GP agreed a referral... now what?

I hope I am posting in the right place. It's my first post here and I'm just looking for some support (I think!).

Basically, my son has just turned 4 and I've had concerns for a while but havent been convinced until I wrote it down. I asked for our HV support over a month ago now and haven't received any so I went to the GP instead.

Here is a list of most of his quirks:

*clothes becoming 'scratchy' (this is new, and not frequent)

*dislike of being dirty/messy, finger painting etc is out of the question

*Dislike of having hair/nails cut - needs a lot of preparation & discussion, role playing, tears, arguments etc for him to sit in the chair & screaming. Doesn't matter where we go, whether it's scissors or clippers etc

* strong dislike of foods based on texture, appearance, smell, proximity to other foods

* did have delayed speech, SALT discharged at 3yo, used to use makaton but now very rarely. Still has some very immature speech sounds. Struggles for new people to understand.

* extreme shyness

* limited eye contact, will avoid if at possible. Will only hold for a second at most

* physical violence displayed when frustrated

* extreme reactions when told 'No' or asked to do something

* dislike of people in personal his personal space, but no awareness/consideration for others

* strong feelings of possession (over people and objects)

* lack of empathy/remorse

* routine obsessed, doesn't respond well to unpredictable change

* repetitive behaviour - actions, food, questions

* no ability to grasp subtle humour

* specific interest in trains/trucks/cars/machinery etc

* no understanding of consequences

* noticeably different behaviour (more control, becomes introverted rather than explosive at things he doesn't like etc) at nursery/in sole care of grandparents. If myself or his Dad are present he will lash out

* meltdowns

* dislike of unfamiliar noises such as hand dryer or other people's hoovers.

* bossy play - his way or no way. With younger & older brother alike.

I spoke with the GP & she agreed that the signs do point to ASD and has referred us to a community pediatrician. I just don't really know what comes next, what I can do in the mean time, who else is likely to be involved etc. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

north london mum over 10 years ago

Hi I hope you get an appointment soon for your son mone took a few months but worth it in the end one thing I would suggest while your waiting for appointment keep a diary of when he has bad days I did this for my son I got an exercise book and wrote down very time he had a bad day which consisted of meltdowns hitting out and what he was doing at the time it really helps me as when we had the first appointment I had it wrote down and they were really happy with it as it helped them get an idea of my sons behaviour plus any questions they asked me I could refer back it too it can be very emotional too when we had our appointment we had a child pycoligist and a speech therapist as my son is non verble they came to us then they assed him in play group as he was not yet in nursery then we did a clinic vist which also included the paediatrician then we we had to wait for them to do there assessment then go to get there findings my son was 2 years and 8 months his now 3 and getting lots of help when we did get told I felt like someone had put a knife through my heart but I was also expecting it at the same time so in another way it was a relief too just knowing it was not just me and his dad thinking something was not right I hope this helps good luck with appointments do come back on here this site is a god send everyone on here helped me massively when we was going through diagnosis x
mumof4boys772 over 10 years ago

I have to say, do not get your hopes up of any diagnoses for a longtime,unless of course you have someone speciaifclly trained,we have had all of your sons symtpoms and more,the first peadatrician fobbed us off totally and the second is goodish,however after being in the system we have been told he has autistic traits and sensory issues as well as hypercussis, i feel when we live the life of hell sometimes how can this just be traits?
autumnleaves85 over 10 years ago

Thank you, I'm finding my around slowly
I am pleased that I have found this as a place that everyone understands the struggles.
I am now looking forward to seeing the pediatrician rather than fearing in it in the hope that I may be able to better understand him & his needs.
Former Member over 10 years ago

Welcome to the forum :-)
Your list of quirks does sound very much as though he is on the spectrum. There is lots of stuff to read on the website and on the forum (note that the forum search is separate to the search facility for the rest of the site). The assessment for ASD will focus on his communication problems rather than his sensory issues. You could take the list that you have written in your original post with you to the assessment.
You need to work out how to avoid and manage his anger problems. Hopefully, the specialists that he is referred to will help you to learn some strategies for this.