teenage diagnosis or not

Hi sanders,

Just wanted to say like UKbloke04 said I believe the diagnoses has helped my son a lot, I expected him to be a bit down and worried about what other people thought but he was happy and said it explained a lot and at least he could tell people why he thought the way he did etc.

sam

x

hello sanders

Sounds like a similar sort of situation as we had with our youngest son.Knew from quite an early age that there was something not quite right,but took years of discussions with school and gp before actually being referred to psychologist.....he too had the temper tantrums/breaking stuff etc.....evenually he was diagnosed with ODD and Aspergers earlier this year at the age of 13,and now he has had the diagnosis we are getting the help we need....so i would say try and get her assessed but stick with it as may take some time as it is with our middle daugter who is also going through the assessment process but her assessment is taking a lot longer than my sons did...just a matter of pushing for it and not being fobbed off by people.

not wishing to speak for my son as such,i think him actually being assessed has settled him in a way as now he has an understanding into why he may be a little different to his brother and sisters and his school friends

Thanks to everyone for your coments they have been very helpful :)  i would be grateful caro if u could send me the link to your article xxx

Hi sanders and every one else

I am horrified at how you were treated originaly and i hope you do get some help for your daughter, i find it very unfair when people dismiss challenging behaviour by blaming parents like that, How anyone can make a decison based on a 5min interview is awful, I think now that your daughter is still struggling they have to take you more seriously.

My eldset son also struggled all his life and wasnt fully diagnosed untill recently when he was 16 and then it was only because I broke down in tears at his peadritrition saying I couldnt cope any more when he was 14, he always had a pead because he also has Dyspraxia and hypotonia. Then it took two years of waiting lists and assesments. but it was worth it he is definatly happier and being treated better by schools and colleges because of his diagnosis. We have been able to put coping stratagies in place for him.Hang on it there and ask for testing and all the support you can get for your daughter.

I wish you all the best for you and your daughter.

Sam

x

I definately think that diagnosis is generally regarded as most helpful to people on the spectrum. Most people I know wish they were diagnosed earlier. It explains so much and helps lift the guilt that you can't cope. 

I was diagnosed in my 50's and have a 21 year old son ,who we believe has the condition although he has not had a formal diagnosis, but it has helped him to know that I have the condition, and what the traits are, as he recognises it in himself. I have written an article on why I believe it is important that parents get their children diagnosed which I could send you if you are interested.

Read away ^^ I'm glad I could help in some way or another.

Since I've been diagnosed I found out the school my 6th form is based at has a special ASD division with other kids with the same condition as me. Usually I avoid people as though they're about to explode at any minute but I went down to the ASD department to meet the other kids. Turns out they're all younger than me, anywhere from 13-15, and surprisingly a lot easier to talk to than 'normal' people. From talking to them I've found out about different coping techniques, like playing with a fluffy piece of fabric or blue tack. One girl has her own rubber band ball that she plays with when she gets angry at other people.

The only other advice I'd give is that maybe your daughter should try and find a 'safe' place to go. I always hid out in the library when things got too stressful because the kids that would try and make fun of me didn't even seem to realise we had a place filled with books on the premesis xD

Its small things like the above that she can do without drawing attention to herself. I relied on some of the above techniques for years before I was diagnosed and I managed to get through high school without any major breakdowns :)

Good luck!

hi kalojaro , 

Thank you so much for your reply . I  am going to let her read your reply if thats ok . I think it would very helpful for her to see that life goes on and that shes not alone . We have been through so much with her in the last 12 years .I will keep you informed of what we have decided . 

thanx 

Get her assessed.

I'm 17 and I've only just been diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome. I've spent my entire life at highschool trying to contain all my worries and fears and trust me it wasn't easy. The urge to lash out at others that make fun of you for being slightly different is increadibly strong but most times it just spurs them on.

Schools are also sod all help unless she's diagnosed. I'm having a hard time actually trusting teachers that want to help me now because I was overlooked so often when I was 'normal'. It doens't help that all the advice and coping techniques they try to give me are for toddlers.

Honestly, if you have even the slightest suspicion shes got ASD get her assessed because if she does have it there are so many things available to help her cope as well as ways to make you understand her perspective. It'll also help you figure out what things she has trouble with in keeping friends i.e. I had no idea whether people were being sarcastic, joking or serious. It's taken me reaching 6th form/college to find people willing to sit down and explain it to me before I get the chance to interpret it the wrong way.

I hope this helps :)