Hi - I'm new here and looking for some thoughts from those who've been through this.
My son, 14, has just received a dx of Aspergers - after 6 years of appointments and is-he-isn't-he discussions! Not surprisingly, this means the dx puts him on the mild end of the spectrum and after all this time, he is very good at concealing his difficulties at school - he brings them home instead ...
First, I'm surprised by my own reaction as I thought I'd have worked through all the emotions over the previous years. It feels like actually having that dx has made some huge difference, even though he's the same person he was before the official label. All the cliches came to life - I felt as though the breath had been knocked out of me, as though I'd been hit by a truck. I haven't been able to talk about it with my friends because it is so hard having to explain - they are good friends but it is like speaking a different language right now.
Secondly, I'm mulling over how to talk with him about it. Obviously, at 14, he knows a fair amount about it all, but also, at 14, he's at an age when fitting in and not being different is crucial to him. So he certainly doesn't tell anyone about it and at the moment, he isn't really up for talking about it even to me (I'm the one he usually brings things to and he is quite open). I want to let him manage this in his own way and at his own pace - it's his dx, after all - but I also want to help him and there are practical things to deal with. I'm not sure if he is just letting it settle, if he isn't aware of how this affects him, or if he's avoiding thinking about it.
So, as I think all this over, I'd love to hear from those of you who've been there, as parent or as the one who's been in my son's position.
Thanks in advance ...