Managing Shutdowns

I always liken a shutdown to someone with a garden that has got out of control.  There comes a point where it gets more out of control no matter how much effort was put in, there are just not enough hours in the day to get it back in order.  So what then happens is that nothing is done.  The only real answer is to start everything again, clear every thing and go back to square one.

This to me is my shutdown.  So many demands put on me, when I know I should finish a job off but then am told to do something else.  So evenutally, the work has built up ... and no matter what it gets worse.  So evenutally, I get to the point I do nothing.  Shutdown and not only in the set task but in other parts of my life as well, even things I get enjoyment from.  And to get it back into order is very difficult, not an easy process.  Too many demands, and not feeling in control causes overload.  Overload means anxiety.  Anxiety causes meltdown and shutdown, not necessarily in that order.  So for want of ever more being required means that the result in the end is nothing is done.

Managers at work tend to think this is something I am doing on purpose.  Yet it is a problem that is caused by their ever increasing demands over things that I am not allowed my control over.  Managers seem incapable of listening, usually they think there i some sort of training that can make everything better.  They seem to think that counselling is the answer to anxiety, rather than removing the cause of the anxiety.  Problems are created in the modern way of living by having too many conflicting demands, too many officials, not enough understanding and too much contol by others.

I have said before on the forums here that problems for autistic people are often caused by the demands of society.  I can certainly work in my own way far more efficiently.  Being Autistic I work by the 'division of labout' method, it is far more efficient.  And unfortunately many managers, especially in the service industry do not understand this.

Another thing I often liken myself to is that of is a caged animal.  We have got a lot more understanding these days of the results of putting animals into unnatural environments.  The animal when caged does not behave naturally.  It paces around, is obviously distressed and can get very bad tempered.  If animals must be held in captivity (and I do accept that a lot of zoological gardens do a good job in conservation such as Chester and Whipsnade) then the environment should create conditions that are as near as possible to the conditions they would find in their own natural homes.

Yet we treat people in this manner and expect them to behave rationally and normally.by neurotypical standards.  The work environment in  by my case seems like a cage.  I do not feel as if I can act naturally and this obviously has repercussions both on me and others.  The whole structure of a work environment is unnatural.  It has come about from the need to control others.  I know I am totally unmanageable, that I work better when left to my own devices, that if I am given an objective rather than an instruction I will work far better.  But this does not fit in with the neurotylipical world.

Ooooooh. The caged animal analogy certainly strikes a chord........totally.

i find that so many decisions and choices are taken away from me...to the extent that I can't do what I want to do or need to do on a daily basis, at home or at work.....too long in the cage gets me down and I crave some BIG space on a walk in the countryside, some quiet space I can crawl into and be totally undisturbed....or to try and reset my mindset with music.

life seems to be set in flight / fight mode.

in terms of work, my previous boss was really really good..you knew exactly what was needed to be done, she would back me up and support me and then give me the creative freedom to achieve it. Like you say...having objectives are great...."what needs to be achieved, why, and when for"

i like feedback in my work as welll....happy with criticism (constructive) or praise.....or I can feel quite lost.

ElephantInTheRoom said:

Like you say...having objectives are great...."what needs to be achieved, why, and when for"

I am rather the opposite to this. Leave me to do something and I get more done, give me a to do by date . . . and . . . things . . . . just grind . . . . . to . . . a . . . . halt, in most cases. I used to have so much trouble with late library book fines, so now I buy books and read them normally from cover to cover in no time at all, and I get to keep them too! Although the marvellous magical book rustler does have its way, especially today actually, bless it.

No.  I filled it with ice cream and gorged on it...

No.  I filled it with ice cream and gorged on it...