Do I have Autism?

People with autism tend to be poor negotiators and we resort to confrontation and complaining too quickly for our own good and this tends to alienate and then undermine whatever we are trying to achieve. I know this from personal experience! Will a complaint actually achieve your goal or will it just attempt to make a point?

If you want to go the private route then you should let the GP identify a diagnostic service rather than you finding one yourself and trying to get the GP to refer. You may not be able to identify the right service yourself or you may end up trying to persuade the GP to refer your brother to a service that the GP doesn't know or that they don't want to refer your brother to.

Given that your GP is supportive and has referred you to the MH team then you could follow this through to see how it goes and then your brother might be able to follow your example. If you did this then you might be in a better informed position to help him navigate the system again. If you get a diagnosis, or at least a recognition that you have significant traits, then this should make it easier for your brother as they recognise how this runs in families.

Thank you, this is all very helpful and encourages me to pursue this with my brother. Today I have considered writing to the NHS complaints dept in our area for the poor " treatment " that David has received to date. I consider that I have enough facts to present to them, in the hope that they will take David seriously. i don't think David will want to meet with another psychiatrist. David doesn't have the mental strength and motivation and could not stand another unhelpful unkind meeting with a psychiatrist. I am very grateful for your response. i cant find any information about anyone who specialises in autism in adults in our area. Could this affect the decision by the NHS to refer David to a suitable professional? 

The mental health system is a million miles from being as good as the physcial side of the NHS. One reason for that is that mental health is actually a long way behind the physical side in terms of being able to come to a certain diagnosis. People with MH problems are actually much harder to diagnose. There are no lab tests and symptoms are often mixed up and people have layers of problems that serve to obscure an underlying problem. ASC has only recently become recognised and there are still a large number of GPs who were trained before ASC became commonly recognised. The drug industry adds another interested party to the mix and they have provided an illusion that their drugs are effective when actually they frequently do more harm than good.

People with ASC often have sensory issues and often get diagnosed with attention deficit disorder. A trained expert with experience of autism should be able to untangle his issues.

A private diagnosis or assessment is OK and will be recognised by the NHS if you get his NHS GP to make the referral - do not just go and find a service on the internet!

hello thank you this is very helpful. I have ordered the book that you mention. For my brother in particular who has seen many phsychiatrists over the years but none have come up with any thing other than anxiety, even indicating that David is a malingerer! David has had enough of these apontments for him nothing has changed. at his most recent visit to the psychiatrist David asked why do I talk to myself the reply he had was ...I don't know why do you talk to yourself? David wants to know what is wrong with him. from being a very popular boy with lots of friends he withdrew one reason he says was because he couldn't concentrate enough to listen to what someone was saying to him! He used to sit right up close to the to with the volume turned up high, my mum shouting at him to turn the to down! He has a high IQ and knew he was clever. He was one point from being on the Mensa register! i could go on one on! I know it will be very difficult for him to attend another appointment for yet another kick!! He always feels worse after! But I think I may have found something here that no one has mentioned before! David's words to me that I will never forget we're this is not a life style choice, do you think I like living like this!! I will prompt him to consider pursuing this with my support. this site is so helpful it feels like there is some compassion and understanding unlike what has been shown in the past. I would like to take this further for David. Why is it so difficult for the medical professionals to show some understanding instead of just offering medication?! The mental health system is appalling! I would consider paying for a private assessment for David but have read that this means little and does not have the same recognition as an nhs diagnosis. It is challenging to pursue this but is something that I think we need to do. Many thanks for reading and your advice and guidance.

Hi Tulip

The test is a good indicator but it suggests that you might well benefit from understanding more about autism and how it leads us into particular behaviours and ways of thinking. When I first suspected that I was affected, I bought this book www.amazon.co.uk/.../1606236342 which did two things for me

1) It confirmed that my way of thinking was the way that people with Aspergers think. It confirmed my suspicions

2) It promoted and explained how to take a positive attitude to having the condition. It gives some practical ways of dealing with things and getting on.

Lots of other books are available but this one did it for me and others on the forum also recommend it.

It is common for people with the condition to be reticent about pursuing a diagnosis. People fear the difficulty of the process and they do not like revealing their thoughts to doctors and professionals. In a sense, your reticence is another confirmation that you might benefit from diagnosis and I would gently encourage you to pursue this.

Thank you for your message. I have completed the test and scored 29. My brother will defiantly score more than this. this all helps me to understand a little more. It's just about trying to understand the reasoning for certain behaviours that are not a life style choice if that makes sense. Some say that it is likely that we could all think of something about ourselves to fit in each category that relates to the symptoms of autism.......it can be stressful just thinking about it after so many years, and quite easy not to pursue it and just accept that's the way it is. I will however, support my brother to seek an assessment other than at the local mental health team. Thank you for reading this and for your advice. 

Thank you for your message, this all helps me to understand. 

I agree with Emma that you haven't absolutely described categorical autism in your post.

However, you have described a life that could well be a result of autism and I think that your friend may well be on the right track. There is a free online test constructed by experts at Cambridge Uni that is actually a good indicator. aspergerstest.net/.../

It often runs in the family and your brother may also be affected - see how you do on the test and see what it says. I only discovered the test after diagnosis and wished I had seen it earlier.

Hi Tulip, being autistic is about having difficulties of a significant nature across a range of areas: communication, imagination and interaction. As your description above does not cover all of these areas and their impact on yourself, it would be impossible for someone to say (and it would be very difficult / impossible to diagnose someone without actually meeting and interacting with them). Having said that, if you feel you might be autistic it is a good idea to seek an assessment as it could help you gain more understanding and acceptance of yourself.

Another thing to bear in mind is that early life experiences could cause some of the difficulties that can alsoappear in autism (e.g. anxiety, or fear of change or separation) so the diagnostic team would need to feel certain that your difficulties are due to autism and not an effect of abuse/life experiences - this can be a difficult thing for professionals to judge. It can be done, though - I presented with an unusual childhood and range of difficulties and I was diagnosed (quite highly on the ADOS) so just make sure you present all the facts without hiding anything and you should get an accurate decision. 

I hope this helps. 

I grind my teeth and have an underachiever thyroid! I constantly try to mange my life and the symptoms, this can be exhausting. My brother who is 53 years, has also struggled since a teenager. He withdrew, he talks to himself, cannot listen and respond to a coversation. He hardly speaks. He has seen several psychiatrists who say that he is anxious. He is upset that he has never known what is wrong with him. He has never had a relationship. He is a lovely person. He has a high IQ and was 1 point off being registered with Mensa! He shows little emotion. I support him as much as I can while struggling with my own symptoms. What do you think? Many thanks