Is it worth a diagnosis

I got diagnosed at aged 49. I sort of hit a brick wall in my life and just could not get out of a hole so needed t know. My biggest concern is my children, not if they are also asd, but if my having aspergers could have damaged them. Both my kids seem well adjusted and I certainly do not believe that people with aspergers lack empathy. I have been told I actually have too much. I care too much that I break and then I cannot function at all. 

I have worked in the past, I dont now and am happy not to. I have got myself into lots of difficulties out there which is why I wanted a diagnosis. I look back now and firmly believe that if I had someone that understood aspergers around me and got me lots of these difficulties would never have happened and I myself would have understood myself better an not beat myself so much to fit in.

I am now learning to accept myself, it will take time though because I no longer have to act it all out. Therefore I don't get physically ill ftom trying to fit into the typical world. I think to myself now you can try and fit into mine or better still we can compromise somehow. 

Regarding the Coventry based psychologist charging £395, I have enquired with the person I was aware of. They have confirmed their cost is £395  - indicating we are thinking of the same person - and the following in response to a question about assessment rather than diagnosis:

"Using a variety of questions and testing methods, alongside [their] expertise, [the psychologist] is able to provide accurate diagnoses. [The psychologist's] diagnoses are widely recognized and [the psychologist] provides [their] service to universities, clients facing employment difficulties, and NHS referrals, as well as private clients."

I really did think that clinical psychology was necessary, rather than health psychology, but I could be wrong - stranger things have happened!

Yes, speaking to the GP to check out their acceptance of a private practitioner is a good idea (if you want it to be recognised). The private assessor in Scotland who I mentioned previously assessed someone following GP referral and seemingly  the assessment/opinion was accepted for diagnosis, and the assessor claims that this regularly happens. It could be because there aren't any NHS diagnostic services in that area.

Sound advice from @curious, in my opinion.

It may be that an assessment may be useful but it might not have any official standing in the health service or in the world of employment or benefits rights. In either case you might do well to discuss this with your GP who may be willing to give a view on the assessment service you have chosen or may be able to recommend an alternative.

Fluffy2012 said:

A few weeks ago, I had a look again and was delighted to find a psychologist in Coventry (a fair drive away but worth it I think) who charges £395, which is a lot more do-able.  I'm hoping to go in May, once I've saved up enough.

If it is the (health) psychologist that I am aware of in Coventry, this may be an example of an assessment, rather than diagnosis. I am not certain of this by an means, and even if the psychologist does not diagnose, this may still meet your needs and not be an issue for you. I just thought it worth mentioning in case it would make a difference to your decision to go there. Of course, having an assessment doesn't preclude a later diagnosis and could still be of benefit in the meantime - especially as you could be seen quite soon.

I am going through some significant changes in circumstance and, although I'm awaiting NHS assessment/diagnosis, this is a long way off. I am mulling over the idea of a private assessment, so I would be interested to know how you (and anyone else) get(s) on with seeing a private psychologist.

In terms of gaining a better understanding of yourself, a formal diagnosis isn't always essential for eveyone.  My own experience since diagnosis is that I have learned much, much more by talking with other people on the spectrum in places like this one.  Despite all their valuable clinical expertise, the majority of the "white coats" are not themselves autistic, and it is also quite common that there is no adult autism service to be passed on to following diagnosis.

On the other hand, I think Curious makes a very good point.  Life is always subject to unexpected "surprises", and sadly some of them are not of the nice Xmas prezzie kind!  If you later realise that a diagnosis would be beneficial while you're in the middle of some kind of crisis, it could end up being a far more stressful experience than it would be otherwise.

It can also help if you want or need to discuss autism with friends and family.  Many people are incredibly skeptical of self-diagnosis, and will be inclined to take what you say less seriously if a professional hasn't confirmed it.  This often applies to other health care workers too - I know from experience that therapies like counselling can go awfully wrong if not adjusted to take one's autistic traits into account from the outset.

Exactly what I've been wondering.  I initial contacted the Lorna Wing Centre but that's very expensive so I stopped looking... A few weeks ago, I had a look again and was delighted to find a psychologist in Coventry (a fair drive away but worth it I think) who charges £395, which is a lot more do-able.  I'm hoping to go in May, once I've saved up enough.

I've been in my new job for six weeks and I love the actual work, but some of the team are really bitchy & I find it hard to deal with.  I cope by 'shutting down' by 9pm every night & exercising.  I decided to make the decision to mention suspected Asperger's on my application and in my interview (thankfully I am very qualified, over qualified actually) & I am good at what I do.  I can't stand the office politics though, which is probably why I am awake at silly o'clock.

Firstly, have you tried the free test at http://aspergerstest.net/aq-test/ this is actually quite reliable but obviously has no official effect but I would highly recommend it. I have an official (private) diagnosis that cost me £1000 (Priory Group clinic - i.e. a reputable private company) and I also score highly on the aq test.

I started my journey the same way as you - I read a book that described "me". However, I needed a diagnosis as work was not going well. Lots of stress and disagreements. The diagnosis has not been a magic wand and hardly anyone knows how to react if you say you are autistic. i was surprised how relieved I felt when I was told it officially and I am glad to have a diagnosis - self diagnosis works fine for some people but you have to make your own decision about whether to pursue it as it will be you that has to live with the choice you make.

I was diagnosed as an adult.  If you feel you need this to answer your own questions about your behaviour or past experiences it's fine.

 My Son is Autistic I wanted to know if I was also.

when I got the result I was relieved that there were,reasons behind some of my behaviour growing up that I wasn't able to explain as a Child/teenager.

It doesn't mean that others will always be so understandimg so please be realistic about what you expect if you are Autistic.

Only tell people who have proved themselves trustworthy in your life.

 If they love & respect you this will not change their opinions of you.

I'm high functioning but if you tell everyone there May be those who try to insult your intelligence & take advantage.

I originally went to my GP who said I wasn't Autistic.

I asked to be seen by a specialist via Adult Social Services. I'm Atypical Autistic. 

No one noticed my whole life. Been diagnosed since 2012 now I'm 40.

Has it made a positive difference yes.  I understand me better.

Hope this was useful ?

Although I've been "making this journey" for a while I have not so far been through an assessment or had a diagnosis.

One thing that I particularly noticed was that you say your job wrong change. Perhaps your job is very secure, but do consider that your job could end at some point e.g. redundancy. If you are ever in the situation of looking for another job (or even a change to your current role) it may be important to have a diagnosis 1) for legal protection against discrimination under the Equality Act 2010 2) if you are starting in a new place of work with unfamiliar people, who may not be as naturally accommodating as your current colleagues.

If you do find yourself in a position where a diagnosis would be helpful, the NHS waiting times (once you actually get onto the right waiting list) are likely to be far too slow to use, for example if you are given a few weeks' redundancy dismissal notice.

If you ever end up having to claim out of work benefits it could be useful to have clear documentation of ASD (assuming you were to be diagnosed with ASD), for claiming benefits, for getting support to apply for benefits, for employment support and for advocating for any details of a "claimant commitment" if you claim JSA.

So I suppose I'm saying that, although life may be stable and manageable at the moment, it is worth considering whether assessment and diagnosis could be helpful to pursue now, to help negate difficulties if your circumstances were to change in future.

As you say, there are private options. I'm not sure whether NAS would hold details of people only undertaking an assessment but who are not able to diagnose. I have been told of someone in Scotland who charges £600 for an assessment but I think it would be against forum rules to post these details. I haven't seen this person so can't comment on the experience. Their details and an individual's experience were PMd to me on a different forum.