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Just been diagnosed

Spuder

Hi

i was diagnosed with ASD on Wednesday and struggling to come to terms with it even though I expected it.  I'm 37 years old and I have a 6 year old daughter with ASD and SPD.  I work part time, today I went into work broke down in tears and went home.  boss doesn't seem to understand because I expected it I should be ok.  Tried to explain its different thinking i am to knowing I am ASD.  Tried to explain it to her like I've just found out I'm adopted, something I thought I was is now different.  I have a follow up apt with ASD service in 4 weeks but my boss says I should have it sooner or speak to my GP.  I'm not depressed but I am struggling to adjust.  ASD service didmy really help me when I got my diagnosis si said they will help in 4 weeks time.  Just told me im now disabled and my husband is now my cared and work will have a disabled policy in place.  Its hard to hear I'm now class as disabled.  How do I move on from here ? Did it take people a while to adjust ? 

  • You're welcome!

    All of that is classic AS experience, and you're right - the public largely don't understand, or even worse, have a total misconception thanks to hollywood et al...

    I think that's why it's good to be on here, you don't have to explain. Phew, what a relief!

    You're doing very well if you've already decided to keep quiet for the moment while you get used to this, Other people have stories that suggest telling colleagues isn't always a good idea. We get mixed reactions for sure. Not sure about your husband being labeled a 'carer', that one took me by surprise I must say. Just because you're AS doesn't mean you're incapable, but it does mean that you'll do things, think, speak and react differently to other people.

    I use the term AS because some people like to call it a Disorder, and some a Condition (my personal preference is Condition). Writing AS is my lazy way of not writing ASD/ASC all the time, and anyway, we're all Autism Spectrum people so what the heck. Find your own way to express yourself, whatever you're comfortable with is fine.

    Welcome again

  • Thanks classic codger

    Only a hand full of people know, mainly family and now my boss.  previously she was keen for me to tell people in my office once I was diagnosed but now I have a diagnosis I don't want to, not until I have my own feelings sorted.  Really unsure what people will think of me if I tell them.  People don't understand autism, it's hard for me to understand it all so even harder for them but generally society thinks autism is either rain man or non verbal.  people think I can't be austic I've managed 37 years ok so I must be "normal" and nothing wrong with me.  But behind closed doors I haven't managed, I have no social life, no friends etc etc.  Only people that are my friends and trust are my husband and my 6 yr old daughteR who is also ASD.  So wish I had a friend I could have a cuppa with and be "normal" and chat like people do.  Wish I couls go to work and talk to people in the office and feel comfortable, but I don't I sit at my desk in silence getting on with my work.  But because I don't get involved they don't include me with anything I may as well not be there.  think I'm just having a bad day.

  • Hi Spuder. Welcome to the Family. You've come to the right place.

    Your experience is pretty much the same as mine - here's your diagnosis, here's a couple of websites you might find useful, see ya later...

    It rocked my world completely. Suddenly, I knew who I was, and at the same time everything I ever thought about myself turned out to be rubbish. My head spun, the world was a very strange place, and it felt like I'd just been zapped by a zillion volts and left out to dry.

    Fortunately, one of the websites was this one, and I've been chatting on here ever since, finding out lots of things about myself yes, but much more importantly, having people who understand and talk to me, and finding out that I am not alone any more.

    Support for adult AS people is poor at best, so unless you're particulalrly fortunate, don't expect too much.

    ASD is classed as a Disability under the Equality Act. You have a right to expect due consideration for yoyr Condition, and that includes workplace condierations especially.

    I would caution you to be careful of who you tell, at this point, and make sure that those you do tell understand that they must keep the information confidential. You'll learn why, later, too much information for you to take in at the moment.

    Yes, it will take you a while to adjust, so try to let yourself absorb information, rather than trying to take too much in at once. We're here, we're supportive, and we'll help you through this difficult time.

    Remember, you are anonymous on here. You can speak freely, we don't judge each other, and most of all, you are safe. You're here with a lot of people who 'get' you, and many of us know how it is for you right now. It will get better, promise.