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Family Party

Roy

I’m becoming very stressed over an upcoming family party, it’s next month and it’s my mothers 80th birthday. 
It’s being held in her house and a lot of people have been invited, I know it will become very noisy and involve a lot of alcohol. 
Im expected to be there, it’s known I will struggle and shutdown but I will still be expected to sit there and pretend to be enjoying it. I know the “cheer up or can’t you just try?” Comments will start, it’s making more anxious as the day draws closer. It’s actually making me feel ill.

I live there when I’m working, so there is no escape. I don’t want special treatment, I just need to be left alone. Messages are pinging back and forth about what party drinking games they could do, I’ve been alcohol free for two and a half years, I don’t want to go back to the old me. If I was to mention autism to any of them, I know it would just lead to stupid comments. Sorry just venting but I know you are the only people who would understand.

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  • Hi   I don’t have any advice, but just wanted to say I absolutely 100% feel your distress. I have the same problems but I havnt figured out a way around it. I also become anxious and distressed in the build up to an event. I then become resentful and angry which makes for a really bad combination of feelings. I get angry because WHY are we expected to do these things? Did we sign a contract? No. Did we give our authority? No. I really do wish you well. I would say maybe tell them you arnt able to take this on/ can only stay for an hour etc but that’s not possible I know. They end up thinking you don’t care which is another misunderstanding. It feels very claustrophobic doesn’t it? 

  • in reply to forget_me_not48

    Thanks for your reply, you describe it all very well, the anger and then dislike of these people does build up. Most of these people behave badly enough when sober, add alcohol and mayhem normally ensues.

    An invite isn’t an invite when it’s compulsory. 

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