Loss of a loved one

Yeah a lot of good memories it’s just hard to think about them and see old photos right now. Yes it is and can be intense. I have cried over him already and as u say timing is everything etc.

Glad that you have good memories and they are there for your lifetime and can be shared with others to help all feel better maybe.  I too find emotions a bit of a roller coaster - can be too intense, so I think I understand.  That said I think there can be catharsis in tears - took me a year before I cried after the death of my father - whenever the time is OK.

All the best.

Ok then thank you and exactly course we do 

Just don't be too hard on your self for struggling it's a hard thing to deal with and we all deal with emotions different

Oh right ok that is what I’m struggling a bit with right now and when I think about all etc. Yeah that isn’t ideal is it all happening on top of each other, yeah hopefully that will help over time etc.

It wasn't too bad looki g at photos because it was made parr of the wake so that helped probably ws salt garden with one of my uncle as he died and my dad was supposed to let me know the funeral details my dad died before the funeral.. We don't know how long before 

Photos and a small amount of belongings is a good way to help though but if it's something like a tv set and your not using it don't keep it if it makes you sad or anxious but more personal things can be harder to decide on  

Sorry to hear that’s so tough all within a short space of time etc, Yes we have some of his belongings and pictures of him and with me etc when we were younger, but it’s tough to look at pictures right now without getting emotional. Good for u people deal with grief in whatever way they think is best etc and if u wanted to keep everything that helps u etc, how did u feel when u first lost your family members with looking at photos etc

Hi Phased and tbh we have a lot of good memories but it’s tough to think of them right now without getting emotional, these things take time. Thank you again.

Thank you Anna. Yes it can and can definitely be tougher when it first happens. Yes I have read through that and I do have support around but at the moment we are at different stages at the moment and we do have pictures but it’s a struggle to look at pictures right now. Thank you again.

I lost my dad my partners mums partner who I was close with and my uncles who I never saw for many years all in a space of 4 years my biggest advice is if you have kept belongings of your grandad short let it overwhelm you I had my dad's hi fis comic books and music CDs etc I kept a few comics in the end as I had no where to store it and it made it easier to deal with the greif as I wasn't worrying about keeping it all in good condition any more so I'm just keeps major 30 out of the 1000s of comics (I kept his full captain britwin set and a few others and any time I regretted not keeping the rest I remind my self of the guilt it caused bot being able to store them) 

Personally my advice is cherish the good thoughts, happy memories and the wisdom that you have of your Grandad.

Carry on making your grandad proud of you.

Best Wishes

Phased

Dear PackArs,

I am very sorry to hear about your Grandad. Loss can be very difficult to navigate. Bunny has signposted a very useful resource. Do you have support around you? Talking about the person and reminding yourself of all the wonderful memories you have can help. Creating a memory box can be a comforting activity. 

I wish you well.

Anna Mod

Thank you Bunny it’s been tough the last few days and is something I have been aware of before people I know have passed away but this occasion is the first time I have been of an age to understand or have someone I really cared about pass away. Ok thank you I will take a look etc.

I’m very sorry for your loss.

I haven’t been through the process myself recently enough to remember how I last processed it, but you might find the advice and suggested resources here helpful:

NAS - Bereavement