Does anyone else with ASD ever feel like they irritate people?

I often feel like I irritate people, I struggle on trying to communicate in their way, but I sense I’m just tolerated and didn’t get it right. I feel that if I mention autism I’m then making everything about me, so mainly I just stay away from people.

I can completely understand that, Roy! I thought being diagnosed might give me the confidence to speak about autism and how its define me, but like you say, I feel like people may think I am making excuses or being narcissistic. I was only diagnosed about a month ago though. Did you diagnosis (if you have had one )help at all?

Hi, I was diagnosed one year ago, I was 57. It did help as in it stopped a lot of imposter thoughts, I had a family member tell me I shouldn’t say I’m autistic unless I am diagnosed with it.

After the assessment I felt happy at first and then sadness at what I thought my life could have been.

I don’t really mention autism to many people, most of my family still don’t know. Most people just don’t understand autism. I’m often still expected to do things I’m not happy with.

It’s viewed that I always seemed to cope, so why can’t I now? The main misconception is that I don’t look autistic, whatever that means. As I stated to unmask and try to make my life easier for me, the reaction was that I’m being awkward.

The answer is yes, the diagnosis has helped. I now know why I’m different, I don’t have to prove anything to anyone, I will be me. I’ve lost a few friends along the way but am happy continuing to explore my world. I hope your diagnosis answers a lot of the questions you must have about yourself.

Thanks for sharing your experience of unmasking, Roy.

I have been masking so much I'm certain I don't actually know the real me. It's exhausting and causing me to have anxiety at work, especially when I have to feign interest in other people and /or their personal lives and end up saying something stupid or that I don't actually think or believe, because I was unsure of the appropriate way to respond in a conversation.

As an [undiagnosed] teenager, I'd unmask only among people I felt close to or those that had indicated they enjoyed my company. That led me to losing most of them, as I out of nowhere became "rude" "selfish"  "mean" or "uncaring".

Your reasons for unmasking - a desire to make life easier- is what's sparked my desire to unmask as an adult, especially at work. I also don't want to feel as though I have to hide who I am from myself or from others. I'd be sensible to prepare in case some people think I'm being awkward, but I'm hoping the wisdom I have now that I'm diagnosed can help me navigate the blind spots that hindered me in the past.

Thanks for sharing your experience of unmasking, Roy.

I have been masking so much I'm certain I don't actually know the real me. It's exhausting and causing me to have anxiety at work, especially when I have to feign interest in other people and /or their personal lives and end up saying something stupid or that I don't actually think or believe, because I was unsure of the appropriate way to respond in a conversation.

As an [undiagnosed] teenager, I'd unmask only among people I felt close to or those that had indicated they enjoyed my company. That led me to losing most of them, as I out of nowhere became "rude" "selfish"  "mean" or "uncaring".

Your reasons for unmasking - a desire to make life easier- is what's sparked my desire to unmask as an adult, especially at work. I also don't want to feel as though I have to hide who I am from myself or from others. I'd be sensible to prepare in case some people think I'm being awkward, but I'm hoping the wisdom I have now that I'm diagnosed can help me navigate the blind spots that hindered me in the past.