How do you protect yourself?

Simple question pietro_21 on a complex topic.

As you highlight avoidance is best however a hermit like existence is not a practical solution.

Violent self-defence MAY have some legitimacy however for obvious social reasons is non-sustainable both for individuals and society.  As a bit of a disclaimer here for my background I trained for many years in martial arts including being awarded 2 black belts.

So then the issue of defending ones well being from a more complex level than that of physical harm from the obvious forms of attack.

I can give my perspective upon this that I think the answer may be in exploring further too.

Seeking support from others to defend one's own well-being is an important key.

This was something of a seed-change for me to acknowledge as implicit in understanding of my own vulnerability.

Support from others I was very fortunate to have, developing this to be less necessary took a lot of tenacity and energy to do - especially since it takes time to discern who and/or what and/or when works in this respect.

I would say that before I could defend my well-being I also had to gather insight into what well-being might actually be for me - especially since I was coming from a strong sense of "unwellness" that I had lived with for many years

To get to this point required developing skills of analysing my own body for signs of health beyond those of "normal" physical health into gaining "interoception" of correlates with mental states that my body gives insight into.  This then developed into the capacity of increased self-monitoring and self regulation.

I guess what I am saying is that we need help to identify what it is we are missing and from lived experiences work towards strategies that we self generate to be "new" people.

For me it was recognising how my posture, how I breathed etc and from this how such physical frameworks correlated with my mental framework too.

This is the domain of linking the body with the mind and the emotions (and dare one say it the spirit too).  There are many therapies that explore this.  They aren't easy but by my evidence they can be learned.

I believe this helps defend well-being by establishing what it was in us that is resonant with a sense of health and personal values.

I find people who I have known who studied martial arts have a lot of discipline when it comes to emotional control. 
my issue may be forgetting the practical element and looking for a quick fix, even though I follow routines it is my own dissatisfaction at the results, or others behaviours that leads me to states like this.

pietro_21 maybe quick fixes are often a result of a "top down" approach.  The best martial arts I have encountered explore the intersection between top down and bottom up approaches to things.  Being a very "bottom-up" thinker myself these days I have found it helpful to explore meeting in the middle!  How we perceive others behaviour and interact with it can change if we all meet in the middle more.  :-)

pietro_21 maybe quick fixes are often a result of a "top down" approach.  The best martial arts I have encountered explore the intersection between top down and bottom up approaches to things.  Being a very "bottom-up" thinker myself these days I have found it helpful to explore meeting in the middle!  How we perceive others behaviour and interact with it can change if we all meet in the middle more.  :-)

I tend to look at things head on, the whole machine not just the cogs. I also do tend to see the best in people once I know them fairly well, although generally I would say if I am thinking in nt/nd terms as I am lately I don't feel nts are meeting anything like in the middle. Should I teach them my ways if all they are going to do is strip them and then carry on in the same direction? This is the sharing (if I know they are uncaring) dillema also in giving as an asd person you have to trust everyone in the group. Having a shared discipline could be helpful in this scenario, as long as there are no rogue players. I would join a group of similarly minded people but I despise banter or knowing that one person could try to derail things. I think total group harmony is a fantastic thing like a flock of starlings.