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Support for lone autistic adult

Chloexoxoxok

Hi all! 

I’m 20 years old and living at home , I’m making this post in hopes someone has a little bit of guidance and knowledge. 

My main and only care giver , my dad, has upped and left for his new younger girlfriend…

It leaves me with my sister who doesn’t live with me , she helps as much as she can but i only see her on the weekends. Aside from that , i’m alone. 

The current living situation for me is just so hard , i’m upset everyday and can only eat one meal. I’m recently officially diagnosed although it’s been accepted by my family for years. I was not ready to live alone , nor can i cope with it - yet it has been forced upon me.

Is there any support I can get from anywhere? I just can’t cope alone , 1 with the practical things and 2 I spiral when i’m alone and my mental health gets bad. 

  • Hello.

    Give yourself a pat on the back and some credit. You say you can't cope but you are. It is not ideal, but you are doing well. No one is really ready, you just sort of muddle through. I appreciate it is hard, it is a big transition.

    Is it a permanent thing or a temporary thing for a few days or weeks? Has someone really just left you the house? 

    The key is to give yourself some leeway and not pressure yourself to be perfect. Take the pressure away and it will be easier. You can take cereal and milk, so that is breakfasts covered. You can make a sandwich, is just sone bread and some cheese or a bit of ham, you can eat a tomato, so that is lunch covered. If you can make some toast and heat a tin of beans you have dinner. You can boil an egg.

    You can make a cup of tea or coffee, so you have hot drinks covered.

    You can gradually expand.

    Use the radio or TV for company. I know it is not the same but sitting in silence is hard.

    Try to keep a bed routine and getting up routine.

    These things will help to steady you so you then have the capacity to think about.what to do.

    Not being so upset will help. You may be doing better than you think.

  • Hi and welcome to the community. I'm sorry to hear you are struggling. Here is a link to an article in the advice and guidance section of this website, that may be helpful:

    https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/social-care/social-care-england

    I hope that being on this forum helps you.

  • Hi  , sorry to hear you've found yourself in a difficult situation. The main thing is to not let it overwhelm you and take one step at a time. 

    I'm not sure about specific advice, but you might want to contact CAB, they should be able to help with guiding you through what help may be around, and as it's local branches, they might know about organisations in your area that can help you too.  Hopefully they can help with any benefits you could claim and know about if you have to pay for bills etc. If you get a lot of letters coming through, try to not ignore them, but go through them one at a time if you can, and maybe get help from your sister on the weekends?

    Maybe your GP could help with mental health issues -they might be able to put you down for some talking therapies so you can learn some good practices to cope when alone. Even planning small trips to say the library might help, as you are around people without having to interact if you don't want to, find books to help you do things, and some have clubs you can join.  

    And you can ask questions on this forum, it can help to find out how others deal with different situations as you experience them.

    Good luck!