I hate being autistic

Thanks for everyone's replies. I don't have the energy to reply to each of you. It's interesting to hear others experiences. Being autistic is currently not providing me with anything positive. It's debilitating. Everyday is difficult. It would be nice to just be able to cope with everyday things and cope with the constant noise, not be continuously misunderstood. Communication is just far too much for me. A lot of it is out of my control so I can't even do anything about it. Sometimes it doesn't seem worth it. 

Thanks for everyone's replies. I don't have the energy to reply to each of you. It's interesting to hear others experiences. Being autistic is currently not providing me with anything positive. It's debilitating. Everyday is difficult. It would be nice to just be able to cope with everyday things and cope with the constant noise, not be continuously misunderstood. Communication is just far too much for me. A lot of it is out of my control so I can't even do anything about it. Sometimes it doesn't seem worth it. 

I kinda get what you're saying but... sadly sometimes autism comes to people without a positive side but that's doesn't mean you can let the evil gremlin kill you speaking from experience I genuinely have hated the experience my whole 25 years of life so far and I'm expecting to dislike the condition forever but aside from it I'm fairly content with what little I have I'm overwhelmingly confident not due to the autism but because I forced myself to be I learnt the hard way how to be confident and to do things that were tough against all odds .

Now I'm honestly content with many sides of my life regardless of how this spectrum has tried to ruin it, I can talk to anyone because I forced myself to chat with anyone and everyone I literally talked to people on buses trains and streets everywhere I forced myself no matter how awkward it seemed to compliment people on their hair their clothes their attitude music so on.. to talk on phones to do interviews to suffer through all the rubbish my disability rejected and now I do it naturally regardless of the impact this spectrum has on me.

Same with personal image I dressed in a way to stand out intentionally so I'd feel uncomfortable and overcome it I wore all sorts of crazy outfits including top hats and steam punk or willy wonka esc stuff so now it's easy I even dressed in animal print stuff and all I received because of my attitude was compliments because I had gained confidence and that's powerful.

I also worked terrible jobs still do even though my education should have got me a proper job I was discriminated against and worked around ex and some still criminals in lowest common denominator jobs I lifted steel for 2 years in terrible conditions on Nightshift, I worked throughout winter cycling at night throughout blizzards and black ice with bike lights and lived it fatigue trying it's best to kill me.

I have cleaned messes that would knock anyone sick in a removals firm and had glass explode on me I've had people threaten my life with knives since I was 6 years old and guess what I'm happy to be alive not because of autism but because I found happy in spite of it screw this condition I'm happy regardless even if I never get what I want I'm happy because I have the balls to not be defeated by it.

Now you don't have to do any of this but don't let it get you down you have to keep going regardless.

Are you tired or overloaded which is making it seem worse?

It sounds like maybe you're trying to do things that are perhaps not compatible with your brain. I absolutely understand the build up of things that makes it feel constantly miserable. I'm wondering what it is you do - education, work etc? And what support you get? It sounds like you could do with a change or more support.