delayed emotional processing

I've realised I say what I think, rather than what I feel. AI picked that up. I think it is part of looking for patterns and a general preference for explaining why I think something. It might also be due to intellectualising things, which is a defensive response.

As a silly example, rather than say "I feel sad (or depressed) because I've lost my job", I'd say "I've lost my job and it is a causing me some issues". The second one feels cold (apparently) and requires further questions to understand.

This approach means that I am isolated from the feelings while talking, giving flat affect and hence limited facial expressions. I may then feel it later in private when I think about how I feel.

I think I may feel something at the time inside, like a knot in the chest, but not always. However since that used to always be there is just learnt to ignore it, which leads to overload and burnout eventually. I now am trying to pay attention to the physiological signs as they mean something.

As an example, I realised I was getting anticipatory anxiety about an eye jab, and noticed my shoulders had raised. I lowered them and it helped immediately.

So maybe I could/should have started by acknowledging "I am happy that you replied" Stuart333   :-)

Indeed, a more NT response that puts the emotions first and makes it easier for them to relate to you and respond 

You might to also want to look at cognitive and affective empathy.

Ask chatGPT about them and how ASD affects them.

Understood

That's a good summation and I'm giving the "this makes me feel" then respond thing a go conversationally - hehe cue weirdness for a while until that gets grooved into the mask.

If masking is energy expensive one might at least try to make the investment to return as efficient as possible!

I'll use that list - thanks 

These are things that one may acknowledge and do for oneself.

 :-)

There still remains the "environmental and situational" conditions where one is/has been unable to extricate oneself.

Sometimes despite every effort the situation calls upon oneself to use the fight or flight energy where it is not possible to convert this into enthusiasm and one finds oneself frustrated.  This can turn to mania.

From which one has to be careful of accumulating emotional damage that will only be mentally acknowledged later...

Blimey gone all Shakespearean maybe:

"Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer. The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And by opposing end them ..."

So I've asked AI about that...

"No, Hamlet likely would not have achieved a "better" outcome even if he understood his emotions, as his tragic flaw of indecisiveness, coupled with the pervasive conspiracy against him, made his demise almost inevitable. His emotional instability was a driving force behind his actions, and if he'd understood and controlled it, he might have acted more decisively, but the play's tragic structure and the political machinations still would have led to his death and the deaths of many others"

Ooops, that took a dark turn sorry!

Best Wishes and thanks again Stuart333 

Understood

That's a good summation and I'm giving the "this makes me feel" then respond thing a go conversationally - hehe cue weirdness for a while until that gets grooved into the mask.

If masking is energy expensive one might at least try to make the investment to return as efficient as possible!

I'll use that list - thanks 

These are things that one may acknowledge and do for oneself.

 :-)

There still remains the "environmental and situational" conditions where one is/has been unable to extricate oneself.

Sometimes despite every effort the situation calls upon oneself to use the fight or flight energy where it is not possible to convert this into enthusiasm and one finds oneself frustrated.  This can turn to mania.

From which one has to be careful of accumulating emotional damage that will only be mentally acknowledged later...

Blimey gone all Shakespearean maybe:

"Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer. The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And by opposing end them ..."

So I've asked AI about that...

"No, Hamlet likely would not have achieved a "better" outcome even if he understood his emotions, as his tragic flaw of indecisiveness, coupled with the pervasive conspiracy against him, made his demise almost inevitable. His emotional instability was a driving force behind his actions, and if he'd understood and controlled it, he might have acted more decisively, but the play's tragic structure and the political machinations still would have led to his death and the deaths of many others"

Ooops, that took a dark turn sorry!

Best Wishes and thanks again Stuart333