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Any advice on how to keep and maintain conversation

Autismman

I’m bad at keeping conversations going and tend to mentally wander or start looking around me. It’s not that I ask because I intend to sharpen my social skills but I ask so that I do not appear quiet or uninterested. I feel bad knowing the other person is having to put all the work in and I can’t think of anything to say. My mind just goes blank and I really rely on them being able to keep igniting the fire before I put it out because of my lack of input. Then I become more self aware that I am not talking and have nothing to say which makes it awkward although it’s not so awkward for me as I don’t mind the silence and thinking time but for others I can not always say this is the case. Keeping a conversation alive is really not a natural ability of mine. So what’s the best way I can fake it till I make it? Thanks 

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  • in reply to Geeky Gothic Guy

    1. Heavy second on this one. I use the strategy of opening up dialogues to see which ones they like, let them talk until we hit a point where I know stuff, share in a way that’s relevant to them, and cut myself off after a certain amount of time. Oh, and lots of laughing at their bad jokes. People like feeling clever and humorous.

  • in reply to Geeky Gothic Guy

    I can often do the same or I have little energy to perform and just nod or attempt a smile, this might be a little awkward if a reply is expected though. The flow of conversation means you are meant to back and fourth with each other while finding the social experience rewarding. It’s a bit like any subject or topic that I haven’t much interest in; I have no data to pull from the bank - empty.