What is something you've realised in hindsight were probably caused by Autism?

I do exactly the same, my answer is always, “I’m fine thank you.” I’ve answered the question I was asked.

Oh, lots of things.. 

What i now know is sensory overwhelm and shutdown, I used to think was just being sensitive or a panic attack lol. Pne example from when i was a young teen, Crying my eyes out and running away because a motorbike drove past. They are so loud! Especially on warm days )I did google this and apparently sound particles travel faster when the air is warm - I knew I wasn't imagining it!)

Also maybe my clashes with authority or anyone telling me to do something right then. I can't count the number of jobs where I've clashed hard with managers, despite actually being an otherwise good worker lol. I've tried to work on that, my current manager doesn't trigger that in me thankfully, but every now and then it gets me! 

Lol I'm also terrible with returning 'how are you? I give my 'all good' response then after my brain cogs have turned I'm like, oh yeah I need to ask them. 

Also yes!! I feel like I didn't watch a full film until I got into my late 20s. I might have been in the room/sat there but my mind was elsewhere, or I was doing other things. Then again I also have an ADHD diagnosis.

My inability at holding a conversation both as a child/teen and now the same if not worse as an adult. I just can't do, no matter how hard I try.

"How are you Vi?"

Me: "Fine." End of conversation lmao

And never finishing films or books in one sitting. I have such a short attention span and my mum always said I was the only child who didn't get absorbed in films when I watched them. I would sit there for 5 then go off and do something else.

Looking back autism is responsible for so much.

I was with a customer, I gave him a lift to drop his classic car off at an MG specialist, the car was to have the windscreen replaced. For some reason the garage owner was giving me the guided tour of the various workshops. I restore classic cars for a living so was interested.

At the end I said thanks and gave my friend the lift home. On the way home he said,”you do know they were offering you a job to run the fabrication workshop.” I just said that they had not mentioned anything.

He said the owner had said several times when showing us around that they were looking for someone with my experience to run the said workshop. My friend is quite ‘well to do’ he explained that’s how it’s done, the owner was  hinting all the way around the buildings. I still didn’t believe him.

I now get the double empathy issue, plus neurotypical people talk in riddles.

When I was much younger, I was useless with the opposite sex. I don't know how the heck I managed to ask one girl out who worked in a shop in town.

I was going home on the bus when i saw her walking down the street. So, I took a deep breath, got off at the next stop and walk up the street until we were face to face. And I just asked her! Wow! She said she was working tomorrow, so if I popped into the shop we could have a chat.

So, that's what I did. I walked in, said "hi" and we talked. But I found it so hard to make small talk and was also very shy. Struggling to think of anything, I told her what I dud yesterday with some mates: taking LSD and going to the woods to marvel at natures beauty (while hallucinating). We had actually been duped. The acid tabs did absolutely nothing.

Well, you csn probably guess how she reacted! With a worried look on her face, she said, "do you think you'd take it again?"

I said, "I wouldn't take it from that guy again!"

Surprise surprise, I never saw her again after that! What the heck was I thinking?!

Quite a few emails from my company went out informing us about employees leaving, saying it was a mutual decision or the employee decided it wasn't right. Never the company making a mistake in hiring or pushing anyone out. I don't think I ever believed it. Maybe legal stuff gets in the way, but it still felt like it was shifting all responsibility, and I think they believe they were never at fault.

They wanted to put something similar for me leaving and I told them no, and that they should just say I've resigned and nothing else. One colleague got annoyed at how cold it was. I did say it was by request, but he was still annoyed they couldn't be more thankful for everything I've done for that company. I will miss the people there, but leaving was overdue.

I have learned to recognise the strange anxiety feeling I get in my stomach when I'm dehydrated. I get brain tired and generally lethargic and anxious when I've not had a drink, so I usually drain my water bottle at that point.

Unfortunately though if I'm in a bad mind state I get PDA and get annoyed that I have to drink to feel better. Why should I have to etc etc. it's illogical because it's how the human body works, but sometimes I don't like it telling me what to do.

Flirting. I can't do it, and I have no idea if someone is into me. My girlfriend (also autistic) first messaged me on Insta and clearly said "I have a huge crush on you". That's how you do it!

Also since discovering I'm AuDHD there's been so many flashbacks through a different lens. Talking everything through in therapy is unearthing a lot of stuff.

Alien0n3arth said:

learned finally to recognise the cause and tge moment and isolate myself from the situation. All that long before I even had any idea about autism and the possibility of myself having it. Till now suspected. 

That is quite impressive.

I've had the fixation meaning I forget to drink. Literally thought to myself "I'm thirsty and should go make a brew". An hour or two later and I'm still sat at my desk. Got to the point where I built a sensor into my chair so my smart home knows if I'm sat down. If I'm sat down for a while, it will remind me to stand up. If I don't, it will nag me every 15 mins

I'm sure he tells everyone that he left of his own accord. That type refuse to admit it even to themselves.

Not realising on time, that I'm hungry, only when I'm almost falling. Especially when I'm hyperfocused on my interest or work. Not knowing why I'm crying. The first one was suspected Epilepsie or diabetes,  but turned out none of them. 

Constantly squinting my eyes also when it's cloudy, now I always wear sunglasses. 

Panic attacks when over stimulated and meltdowns as a kid, if something was misplaced and I couldn't find it. But I won the battle with my meltdowns,  learned finally to recognise the cause and tge moment and isolate myself from the situation. All that long before I even had any idea about autism and the possibility of myself having it. Till now suspected. 

I've just left a job I was in for a long time. In the words of a good colleague "you could be a PITA, but in a good way". Essentially I fixated on the company values and ensured we kept to them.

Unfortunately it got to the point that, as you said, the company didn't like that I was sticking up for what I thought was right in terms of employee protections, code of conduct, etc.

Probably the other notable thing is being sacked from every job I've ever had, except for being self employed, I seem to be getting on great until all of a sudden I'm not.

I miss signals about attraction, they go right over my head, I think someone s being nice and friendly, not chatting me up, it's got me into all sorts of trouble over the years.

Floor time is just as important as car time. I used to get super high anxiety just walking around day-to-day, and while I thought it was OCD, I realize not it was just my brain trying to interpret why the truck driving by made me suddenly want to cry. Sensory issues, yo.

Thanks Paul yeah it was an awful shock at the time but karma caught up with him in the end. He was soon shuffled off himself which would have been a massive deal for an egomaniac like him

I agree but my colleagues and various bosses did not. I never really learned when to keep my mouth shut and just keep my head down. I struggle to let a perceived injustice go by!

I had this exact same experience. Looking back all the "signs" were there but i couldnt recognise them.

White_Dragon said:

Next day I discovered my error

Seems legit to me. I guess the "error" was stating publicly that the meeting had gone on longer than expected, but still seems like the bigger issue is it actually overrunning. Sounds like what you had done was state a fact.

I've been in meetings that have overrun and it annoys me so much. In my mind people have a "respect meter" of how much respect I have for them. If they're constantly organising meetings that overrun or causing meetings to overrun, it's almost guaranteed to reduce their meter, and even more so if they don't apologise for it. It just seems like basic common courtesy. If they're willing to use your time with no consideration to other things you might have to do, doesn't seem they have respect for you either.

Time is precious.

I've been married for 25 years and still struggle to read those type of signals! There should be a book that explains it all. Not that my ADHD would let me read it